I looked in the mirror earlier, and as I told Tom, a beached whale stared right back at me.

“You’re not a beached whale,” he said. “Look closer. Mirrors don’t lie. You really do look fit and you’ll become even fitter with time.”

Hmm… really?

I checked the mirror again.

Beached whale!

Has she ever done anything to me since I left Arizona? someone asked.

I don’t know. Again someone tried to take over one of my accounts – this time this blog – and so I just don’t know. It’s quite a coincidence that around the time that she or someone she put up to it, if they aren’t acting on their own, I start getting hacked on various sites. Nonetheless, when I went to log in to Blogger yesterday there was a message saying they detected suspicious activity from my account and I had to enter a captcha code to get in. Then I changed my PW.

I have stronger reading glasses on the way. I wanted frameless, but they didn’t have children’s sizes in frameless, so I got a partial frameless pair in pink.

I’ve come to hate weekends and so I’m glad the weekend’s over. I hate it because the dogs are at their worst and because Nane’s not around on weekends, even though she “appears” to be in on Sundays.

I dreamed of Tom and I in my parents’ old cottage at the beach in Connecticut. Only it was much bigger than their cottage actually was which they sold 20 years ago or so. I suddenly decided we should sell it for “extra” cash and with its furnishings, too.

The scariest dream I had has me worried about impending trouble ahead. It was our anniversary and we’d apparently been continuing to receive money-filled cards from his shit mom. But this particular card had nothing. I could see that Tom was hurt and disappointed. Especially since we were struggling.

“Are we still going to be ok?” I asked.

“Now, no.” Then he said something about something going on till next Tuesday.

Although this registered as less than a week in my mind I said I wanted to “hurt her back.”

He didn’t want me to and I asked if he wanted me to call my folks instead. He said no. Then I suggested we pawn our wedding bands. He pulled his off his finger and was inspecting it when I went to check for other jewelry to pawn. That’s when I woke up and ran out to warn him that we’ve got trouble ahead. He insists everything’s fine and that the dream was too closely based on old memories from a few years ago when we really did pawn our rings.

I hope he’s right!

I don’t hate Andy. We just clashed too much. I really do wish him the best in life, but the sleep disorder (which I was surprised to hear Alison has actually heard of) wasn’t the only thing he’s made false and mean remarks about. He’s judged and critiqued me for other things as well; the way I’ve handled family members, old neighbors, etc., and it’s pretty insulting to have what’s supposed to be a friend side with your enemies. It’d be like someone making excuses for a woman’s abusive lover. Different people may handle different things in different ways but if someone I cared about was victimized or hurt in any way by someone, the last thing I’m going to do is defend the asshole(s)!

Later…

I have really learned something about having online friends – never assume too much about them until you know for sure! Never assume that not hearing from them means they’re mad at you because you recently annoyed them when in fact they could just be having computer problems or busy. Never assume friends are indifferent as to what happens to you just because they don’t reply to all your messages when in fact they just might not like to write and could simply tell you to fuck off if they really didn’t care about you. Lastly, never assume that just because they may seem busy and distant in both mind and geography they don’t drop into your blog every so often even if it may only be once a lifetime. LOL, so now that I know Nane reads this blog at times I will be doubly sure to watch what I say about this lovely person who really does – OMG! – seem to genuinely care about me the more we chat.

I don’t mind being an open book for the most part but I try to respect other people’s privacy, so unless it’s just trivial stuff, I’ll be even more selective about what I say just in case she ever wanders back in. :) She knows that unless I ask her not to, I don’t care what she tells other people in regard to me.

Anyway, the hottie and I chatted briefly yesterday about Hurricane Irene. “Jim” had to leave early (nice guy) so that’s why she was in on a Sunday. She threw me at first saying she wanted to ask me about Irene. I thought she was talking about the person and I was thinking to myself – well, what do I know other than that she went to Italy on vacation? But Nane wasn’t quite sure as to my exact location and whether or not the storm would affect me.

Just to hear from her really put me in a better mood and I still can’t figure out why, LOL. She’s beautiful and she’s sweet, but that’s all for now about the Königin von Europa. :)

She admitted to being in my blog when I mentioned “anonymous” visitors from Germany. Only she said she came in from work. So does that mean the ones that really are anonymous could really be her after all coming in from home? But what would she be doing at home at 2:15 on a Monday afternoon? Either way, she said she doesn’t have as much free time as she’d like but when she does she enjoys reading my messages and blog. :))) How flattering!

Lost another two pounds – yay! I was kind of surprised as I seemed to get stuck in the same rut weight-wise as I am in life.

Most changes suck, and I was worried it’d cause problems, but I like Facebook’s latest change and how they made it easier to control who sees what we post. So as I told Maliheh, she may see more on my wall if she checks me out from time to time. I still check on her every now and then too, but we’re still not connected there as of yet. She posted some pictures of the tornado and her backyard when it snowed. The main thing is keeping my friends hidden from the troll.