Andy is now in the air and on the way to the desert!

Anyway, looks like Jan has no children and is in a relationship with a woman as of last year. Wow, I’m kind of surprised. So that married woman with 3 kids that I thought might be her really wasn’t her after all, just like the daughter Betsy had said when I went looking for her a year or two ago.

Jan was a pretty good-looking woman. What I usually go for – tall, dark, and older. She was part of the Klamath Indian tribe and was just an attractive lady overall. I got the feeling she was smart, capable of putting her foot down when necessary, but not mean or crazy in any way. What I like in a woman but tend not to get.

Thank God I could get a guy as great as Tom is or else I’d really wonder what the hell was wrong with me. And so I love women but choose men. I pretty much always have. Oh, I could get a woman, all right. She just has to be everything I wouldn’t want her to be.

Anyway, Jan had a cute little gift shop but eventually sold it to take her treasures online. She had given me a pen with the web address on it, but I haven’t seen the pen in a million years, so who knows where it is. I could never find her site, if she still has it, either.

In her profile picture, she still looks the same, but maybe with slightly shorter hair and maybe a shade or two lighter. Saw a picture of her woman and I would never peg them for a couple. Neither of them looks like lesbians. I know it’s a matter of personal taste, but I never liked the lesbian “dress code” anyway. Maybe that’s why I always had such a hard time attracting women. I refused to cut my hair off (above the shoulders) and act, talk, dress and walk like a guy. I was meant to be a woman, like it or not, but again, to each their own. To me, it just defeats the purpose of being attracted to women, IMO. I have always wondered about women who were attracted to people like Ellen Degeneres and KD Lang. Are they really attracted to women, or could they perhaps be attracted to men with pussies? I guess it depends on what’s important to you. I tend to look at people as a whole and I think that’s why I’ve always found women more attractive than men or women that look like men; because I like a more feminine look overall as a whole. Not as feminine as I used to but sort of in the middle. You can’t tell Jan’s gay, though I have seen more feminine.

Anyway, maybe that’s why I like to have a cyber GF or two. It’s my way of having what I can’t have. I keep them at a safe distance while I get to keep the man I would love even if he became horribly disfigured in a fire or something. Only problem is I don’t do much better of a job attracting good-looking, sane women with brains in cyberspace any more than I did in the real world. Then again, once I was married I did actually do a better job of attracting what I wanted; I just couldn’t have them. Someday. Someday I will have a friend with benefits and enjoy the variety of both worlds. I just may have to settle for a little craziness or a little ugliness cuz I ain’t hot enough for the hotties and am a little too batty for the sane ones.

I was thinking back on dream premonitions I’ve had that weren’t premonitions at the same time they were. I dreamt a friend’s Mom would die at the end of last year. Instead, it was my Mom who died. I dreamt my sister would die. Instead, my brother died. The point is that someone did die. Kind of makes you wonder.

Speaking of dreams, I asked for a sign in my dreams if we had any chance of getting the place we want as I was falling asleep. Well, I had a dream I was packing some stuff but never saw where we were going.

Meanwhile, the realtor left Tom a message asking him to give her a call but didn’t say why. God, I hate that! I hate people leaving us wondering what the hell they want. She probably got an offer on the house or needs to reschedule this weekend’s showing. Or maybe the place sold, though I don’t know why she wouldn’t have just said so.

She did tell Tom that she managed the park it’s in for 18 years and that she isn’t very fond of the current manager. I hope she’s not another Stacey! If it is we stand no chance of being let in without credit.