Now it’s my turn to lose weight for seemingly no reason like Aly. It’s just another half a pound but that’s something for an older person with a bum metabolism and thyroid. Maybe my thyroid is actually better, though. With 10 weeks of taking my medication consistently, I’ve got to be around 6 or 7. But that’s still mildly hypo and while I’m eating healthier overall, I’m not eating healthy all the time. Yesterday is a good example of that. I was a little hungrier than usual yesterday and ended up having between 1600-1700 calories. I’ve had so much more fatigue lately that I haven’t been exercising nearly as much, so it could be some muscle loss, although I doubt it.

Been hot flashing a little more lately which is discouraging because if that and the fatigue can pick up again, so can the anxiety.

My lymph node is still swollen to the point that you can just make it out by looking at my neck but only if you knew what to look for. It’s not that obvious. I can definitely feel it more than I can see it. Sometimes I feel a slight scratchiness in my throat when I swallow. Tom still thinks that it will back off in a few days. I don’t think so, but I know I’m really sick of doctors and would still like to try to wait until I see my PCP in October at which time she’s going to do a full panel of blood work and not just thyroid and cholesterol.

Made homemade macaroni and cheese in the crock-pot and I think it came out shitty. It smelled great and it tasted good, but the texture was kind of fucked up with “heavy” noodles and the creamy part being too runny. The good thing is that Tom loved it, so it’s not like it’s going to go to waste even though it didn’t even cost five bucks to make. It was just a box of elbow macaroni, milk, evaporated milk, and cheese.

Good thing I got up before the fucking motorcycle came and went. Probably Tom’s son, the guy across from Dixie. I don’t know if she’ll win, but I’m glad she’s going to get a lawyer and fight the park on the palm tree issue. There’s no way, after all these years, it’s suddenly blocking drainage. Especially when palm trees have such short roots. She said the park isn’t allowing palm trees anymore. Yeah, if it was up to this fucking park, they’d practically bulldoze everything out of here with the way they love to cut trees down. The cutting of the trees here, in general, has been unbelievable right along with the projects, traffic, and everything else.

I told her that since she likes that tree and isn’t planning to move within a year, it’s great that she’s going to fight them. We only complied with their last two demands because it was something we were going to do anyway, but so help me God, one more complaint - just one more - and I’ll be quick to put them in their place and remind them that they’re not only not our parents but we’re the ones that live here and we’re the ones that pay. Therefore, they’re not to contact us again.

Tom also thinks I should stop taking Benadryl when I’m having trouble sleeping and that it’s part of my fatigue. Now that’s something I can definitely try, especially when I don’t have any scheduled appointments right around the corner. I was up till nearly 3 a.m. and was woken up by a nightmare which certainly didn’t help.

A couple of guys tried to kidnap me in the nightmare. Tom and I were staying in this building that may have been a hotel. The ground floor was long with many doors off the sides of the hallway. Tom was asleep in one of the rooms closer to the entrance. The rooms had two beds in them.

I was coming in from wherever one night. Just as I entered the building, I turned to look behind me and saw this guy running up to the door. I quickly pulled it shut so it would lock, thinking he didn’t belong in the building. But then I saw him reaching into his pocket and assumed he was taking out a key and that he was staying there after all. So I pushed the door open and demanded to see a key since he stopped reaching for whatever he was reaching for in his pocket.

Suddenly, there were two guys and they were trying to kidnap me. I began screaming Tom’s name as loud as I could. I was wearing a jacket and they were pulling on the sleeves. I managed to wiggle my way out of the jacket and run toward our room.

The guys began to leave due to all the racket I was making but then they stopped as if they were considering changing their minds. The dream ended with me hoping I got the right room in my panic as I busted through the door to one of them. Instead of regular doors, the rooms had swinging doors. Once inside the room, I saw the outline of Tom asleep in the bed and continued screaming for him to get up.