Despite being blessed with another round of decent sleep, the fatigue is back. I’m wondering if the melatonin or Claritin could have a hand in it. Or maybe, as much as I still hate to admit it, I really do have chronic fatigue and have just been getting more breaks than usual. I’m trying to embrace and accept the CF and look at its positives. When I’m tired, it slows me down from doing things as fast, and therefore I don’t get as bored as quickly. Also, if I suddenly had energy more often than not, not having money would be harder on me because I’d want to do more things we couldn’t afford to do.

The fatigue is likely to get worse because, once again, coincidentally, the storms are going to be picking up the more I have to sleep during prime storm time. We’re gonna get dumped with a lot of rain over the weekend, and I’m guessing it may be due to Erin’s outer bands. That fucker is massive! Had that slammed into Jessie's area head-on or formed in the Gulf, we’d be fucked.

Tom went to the lab today and then to bed a little while ago. It could start storming tonight, so hopefully his sleep won’t be disturbed since he has to donate tomorrow, even though he doesn’t have CF and can handle the disturbances a hell of a lot easier than I can.

It’s been fun sharing VR vids and pics on Facebook. I stopped sharing them on Bluesky because it’s so much easier to transfer them to Facebook. I may not be consistent and share one every single day, but I want to ultimately share me playing a round on each of the golf courses, along with all my meditation environments.

As the 22nd approaches, I realize it’s Nane’s birthday. She’ll be 65. I guess she’ll be retiring soon. I wonder if she’ll retire in Turkey or Greece, like she told me she wanted to. I also wonder what her health is like and if she’s alone or not. Is she even in the same apartment she had been in for nearly two decades when we last talked?

The honker seems to infiltrate my life, whether he’s here or not. In one of the dreams he was in, he had a large piece of land, and I had to cross part of it for something I was working on. I wondered if he would come out yelling at me. Then, in another dream, he was happily giving me a tour of his place. “Look at your huge oven!” I exclaimed at one point, asking him how he reached the back burners, and he said that it was hard. The thing was almost at eye level with me and very deep.

I’m still getting tons of bot visitors on PB, but not as many as before, because a guy at the tracking site and I have been setting up a bunch of IPs to ignore. I’m finally able to see who visits me there and on Blogger. Seeing a certain visitor on both sites put a smile on my face. Granted, I have talked to several people from that state on PB who could be aware of my Blogger account, so I don’t know anything for sure.

Speaking of PB, I think I’m going to pull back and take another break from them because we’re back to the tech issues, and I’m not gonna play the PB glitch game all over again for the millionth time. Things were running smoothly for a while, but now they’re fucking with things again, which is screwing things up. Again, everyone else can get their shit together except these guys. I still wonder if the two guys running things are really the same person. It doesn’t matter if they are, but I’m not gonna deal with the tech issues. I’m not going to kill the account, but I’m not going to be there nearly as often.

Melanie and I can keep in touch on Facebook. In fact, she messaged me to ask if I’ve had issues logging in. I told her it was nothing new and that they’ve had intermittent issues ever since I joined in 2013.

Okay, onto some questions I’ve been asked and journal prompts.

Do I think we’ll move?
I know life has been and can be full of surprises at times, but looking at it logically, I would say no. I think this is it. We don’t have much money, I have health issues, and we’re both getting up there in age, too. So I don’t see that happening in the future.

Am I worried about who may find my blog?
No. I used to be, but then I realized that when we go looking for things online, we may not like what we find, and we can’t expect others to be responsible for our feelings. Of course, I wouldn’t want to intentionally upset anyone, but I have to live my life and do my thing just like others have to. As long as no one’s doing anything wrong, I don’t see the point in worrying about what friends, neighbors, acquaintances, or whoever may find my blog.

Do I feel I’ve changed more than most people?
Yes, I do. Personality-wise, I’m still similar to how I’ve always been, but I’ve learned a lot and I handle many things differently than I used to. Things that would get to me in the past hardly faze me now, and other things would get me to react in a way most people wouldn’t like, where I used to turn the other cheek.

Would I date someone half my age?
Nope. To each their own, and I get that age is just a number, but I could never see myself with anyone 20+ years younger or older. For me personally, it just wouldn’t feel right. I don’t think many couples have that big of an age gap unless it’s about money. I know there are plenty of younger women with much older, rich, famous men. I would go perhaps 15 years younger, but because I’m getting old, I really wouldn’t want to go older. It’s bad enough having a husband 8 years older. I would love to have him a few years younger than me or at least my age, even if that meant he would have to go back to work.