It seems I had several dreams about Nane last night. One was a bit disturbing. I was walking alongside her somewhere (at least I think it was her) when I said, “Don’t ask me to explain, but if you don’t hear from me after this date I didn’t dump you, I’m in prison.”

Once again I jumped back into Word since OpenOffice’s quirks and problems were pissing me off. Sometimes I wish computers had never been invented and life was as simple as it was 20 years ago. Then again, I’ve had so much fun with them, won so much money, “met” so many neat people, reunited with people from the past, learned new languages, etc., that it’s become such a way of life. Can’t imagine life without computers and sometimes I wonder how the hell we ever got by before they became a regular thing.

Did a light workout, but nothing that could make me hungrier and encourage me to slack off on fixing the damage I did over the last few days by pigging out.

Although I didn’t get up till nearly noon, it’s been amazingly quiet so far save for a few barks. I expected the sawing to start up at 1:00 sharp, but haven’t heard any buzzing yet. It’s a bit cloudy today so I don’t know if that’s got anything to do with it or if someone complained or what. We’ve got a few more hours of daylight, though, so anything could happen between now and then.

Later…

It’s only a feeling. It cannot hurt me. It’s annoying and it’s distracting but hunger cannot hurt me. This I keep chanting to myself over and over like a broken record whenever the hunger bites bad enough to make me contemplate pigging out. I may be fit and I may not be that fat, but I still gotta work at it to stay this way. I’m naturally muscular to a degree, but overall I’m just not naturally slim and fit.

I almost dumped Bunny Nose. The lack of sales lately not only doesn’t help motivate me but I’m sick of “translating” for my non-English speaking characters, LOL. So I decided to go back and make “Ingrid” bilingual. This will make the story flow a lot easier for me, and well, I do like to write no matter who is or isn’t paying me to do it. I’m still creeping along with it but I expect to move at a faster pace now that I’ve got plots and characters fleshed out a bit better.

Last night I thought of Marie and I got to missing her. She’s one I could never hate or stay mad at despite how crazy she drove me. Pest or not she really loved and accepted me as I was. She never questioned or challenged a damn thing about me. She even “loved my fire.” The fire that most are put off by. If she’s still with her wife then she should keep her from driving me too crazy, I figured, so I thought it would be nice to give us another chance, only we’d be just friends this time and not a cyber item. So I sent her a friend request before I crashed yesterday in the wee hours of the morning and was later surprised when she didn’t either accept, reject, send a note, or do something. Could something be keeping her from getting online? Could she be thinking about what to do? Hmm… Marie never struck me as the thinking type. She doesn’t think, she just reacts. So unless her wife was standing over her shoulder and ordered her to ignore me (and Marie would happily oblige like an obedient little puppy) it’s hard to believe she’d reject it or just blow me off. Whatever the case may be - glitch, hesitation, lack of access, the invite has been sent. I actually wanted to message her first but I saw no way to do so. I did message Becky, though, to see if she’s heard from her.

We’re supposed to be on for rain tonight and tomorrow (it figures I have to be sleeping half the day away now), then it’s back to the drought we’ve been having. The wind chimes are going off and I thought I heard a little sprinkle on the roof, but nothing major yet.

Last night I ended up studying German for about 3 hours mostly by reading German blogs. I still can’t figure out why I’m so addicted to learning such an ugly language, LOL. I’m dreaming in the damn language. Oh well.

Gute Nacht, freunde. :) Haben schöne Traume!

Went underground on thoughts.com by creating a whole new account in a bogus name to hopefully avoid detection from the troll, but that will allow me to keep in touch with a couple of friends there. Even they suggested creating a new account, though thoughts.com doesn’t require a real name anyway. I had created my other account through Facebook, but this one I signed up for independently. I missed a couple of friends there that have really nice blogs. They seemed to have missed me too, judging by the “hugs” and the little welcome back party they threw me, LOL.

Anyway, I won’t bother mentioning my username since I’m still going to write as myself on Facebook and for my email recipients. I’ll just say that I’m calling myself Misha there and giving anyone else I mention an alias as well. Along with sticking to a pen name there, I’m making sure not to mention my real name, location, age, DOB or anything else that could give my true identity away.

Still don’t know yet what I’m going to do with my old blogs. I just can’t seem to make up my mind about them. I guess I’ll either pick up where I left off at some point or I’ll just forever leave them sitting there.

I’m using OpenOffice again and it’s taking some getting used to. I configured it the best I could and while a part of me will always miss Windows, safer here or not, they all really do have their pros and cons. I just have to get in the habit of doing things the new way and that’s going to take time after spending nearly 20 years doing things a certain way.

Today was wonderfully quiet and yesterday wasn’t too bad, but weekends tend to be a bit quieter anyway.

I took the last few days off of dieting and have steadily gained a pound a day ever since. Gotta wonder how many days in a row I could do that if I never went back to watching my calorie intake. Oh well. I’ll run it back off over the week.

I forgot to mention yesterday that the night before last I had a dream that Alison died of cancer. I really hope that doesn’t mean anything! I’m not going to tell her about it. Why worry and upset her for what I hope is no reason at all?

I was right in suspecting the library the troll was going to have their cookies turned off as there’s no way she wouldn’t take the time to check for any updates on my Thoughts page when updating her own. According to her blog, which she deleted for the millionth time, she said her mother is now allowing her to go online but only twice a day. Now that she’s peeking in on me from home, she’s showing up on TIP. The sicko will look for me for the rest of her life!

Also, 3 weeks ago she started using her Formspring account for the first time in about 5 months. She’s only answering questions she’s asking herself, but this doesn’t surprise me. It was 4 weeks ago that I stopped public blogging, so of course she’d spend more time there as that’s the only account she knows about that’s currently public, though it’s Andy’s and not mine. She could Google my account on the wallpaper site, but there’s nothing to see there but graphics. But all my other accounts are either not being used, deactivated or set to private, so it wouldn’t surprise me to know she’s spending more time at least following Andy’s account on Formspring where she knows I just might mention her and Alison. Both Andy and I agreed to at least not mention her, though. I don’t want to give her an ounce of encouragement. Her warped sense of reality gives her enough encouragement on its own without any additional help.

Got back a couple of hours ago. What a gorgeous day! Wish I hadn’t worn long sleeves. We now have windows open and fans on. Got the boots I wanted and am glad I didn’t get them last weekend like I almost did because they were half off. So for just $12, I got a pair of black, low-cut boots with a 2” heel. All they had were wide soles so they’re a bit roomy even with thick socks but very comfortable.

I didn’t get any earrings or anything else other than an adorable birthday card for Andy. It’s got a picture of a cat with a mouse sitting on its head and it’s so cute.

When Tom got up yesterday there was no water pressure and the poor guy couldn’t shower. He freshened up with wet wipes instead. By the time I got up at 8:15, though, it was fine.

The daily saw sessions started up not long after we got back. They seem to go from 1:00-4:00 and since it’s been going on since last August, according to my journal, I don’t expect it to stop anytime soon. I wish the people in the West were as quick to complain about noisy people as they are in the East. Then maybe something would be done about our little saw-happy folks and our regular engine gunners. Even if I had to hear the same exact sounds if we moved, I’m ready to do it in a bigger, newer place than this little old dive. But Tom won’t be turning 55 till late June and we want to keep all our options open. Meaning that we’ll be checking rural rentals too, though I don’t think we’ll find anything nice that’s very affordable and not on a shared lot. We’ve been sharing since 2004 and it’s definitely time to be selfish once again! I miss having the lot to ourselves.

They say it’s going to rain on Tuesday. I hope so because it would be wonderful to get a day off from the saws and the motorcycle which Jesse has taken to stopping and starting and stopping and starting over a 15-minute period. But all we’ve had is sunshine, sunshine, and more sunshine and no one wants to be indoors until dark.

If there’s any good it’s that Jesse hasn’t gone out at night on weekends and left us with barking all night long in about a month now. If he has, then he’s got someone staying with him and I’ve wondered this at times. It’s been way noisier up there for the last month or so.

The propane people didn’t get here till 6:30 yesterday, but as always, it’s nice to have a full tank like it is to have a full refrigerator.

Did some laundry, wrote up the grocery list, and now I’m waiting for the propane people to get here. I don’t need to be present when they come, though, and I don’t expect them till later. He likes to save us for last when his tank is emptier because of the steep hill.

OMG, we’ve GOTTA get out of here this year! I can’t take this shit of his anymore. I don’t know if he thinks it’s just a big fat fucking funny joke or if he just doesn’t give a shit, but I give a shit and I’ve had it! Just minutes after I was wondering why it was 11am and still quiet, he buzzes around on the ATV, then roars out on the motorcycle. Just 20 minutes later he roars back in. About 10 minutes after that he guns the fucking thing for 10-15 minutes till I finally have to blast the shit out of the sound machine to drown it out just to concentrate on making the damn grocery list. Really, this is no way to live even if I have seen worse. Certainly NOT what we came here for.

I hope to hell Tom keeps working and that we really do get outa here this year. I really think an adult community is our only hope of escaping the bad neighbor curse since we’ll never be in the middle of 50 or more acres. Even then, it’s like whatever’s up there would just have to find a way to intrude upon the peace and so I’m sure it would use sonic booms or other flying objects to get at me.

You watch, now that I’ll be up this evening the cock will go out and no one else will be there. I still think someone’s staying with him most of the time, though. The dogs are too quiet when he leaves.

Andy had me cracking up on Formspring saying he too, hopes we move cuz that damn cock up the hill is annoying him too, even though he’s on the other side of the mirror (country). The Other Side of the Mirror is a Stevie album just like there are two Girls in the Mirror. Of course if I’d known this a couple of years ago I just might’ve been the Girl in Your Imagination or something.

I know this is a boring entry; me bitching about my noisy landlord and the saw addicts in back, but not much else is going on at the moment. The rest of the day and night should be pretty laid back till the busy weekend arrives once again.

Well, there are a couple more things I could bitch about, actually, since I seem to be really good at it. I’m not only sick of basically being called a liar, however nicely some may put it when they don’t get/believe something I tell them, but I’m also sick as shit of having my motives questioned. Okay, so I know there are a lot of assholes out there and some of us aren’t used to kindness. But it really gets old when people “wonder” why I’m so nice to them. Why can’t they just be grateful, appreciate me as I am, accept my friendship for what it is and leave it at that? And if one more person insists I don’t know what the hell I’m talking about or am making excuses or lying about something I damn well DO know what the hell I’m talking about and that’s not an excuse or a lie, I just might be tempted to go along with them and be like yeah, yeah, whatever. Really, I just get so sick of explaining and defending myself that I think it just may be easier to be like yeah, you’re right. I’m just fucking with you. Just making excuses and making up stories cuz the truth hurts too damn much to face, etc. Then I would be lying but sometimes it’s easier to just let people have their way and believe whatever they believe. Some say God works in mysterious ways. I say it’s in cruel and unfair ways. But who am I to say they don’t have a right to their beliefs, right?

Here’s another truth to face - it’s 80 degrees in here. Perfect time to open windows and air the place out:)

I guess that’s it. No, wait! One more thing to bitch about - why the hell can’t I satisfy my hunger today no matter what I eat??? I started with a 190-calorie protein shake. Still hungry. Then it was off to have a 350-calorie TV dinner. Still hungry. Then I slammed on a 180-calorie protein bar. Still hungry. Lastly, I tossed down a sandwich that was probably over 400 calories and guess what, folks? I’m still hungry. What the fuck’s the matter with me??? What is making me so damn hungry so often? I only worked out 15 minutes today. I’ve got to get up the nerve to start puking at least some of this food up or else I’m never going to lose weight regardless of the fact that Special K says I’m not “fat enough” for their diet plan.

Okay, that concludes my daily bitchfest:) I’m going to eat the place down till I throw up.

Talked to my folks today and they sound much better. Dad sounded chipper and coherent. We mostly talked about work, weather, and things like that. He also dropped another hint; one that only his daughter or anyone else who knows him well enough could pick up on. When we hit upon the subject of our hoping to live in a real house someday and the possibility of moving to Florida he said, “A few years and you’ll have enough money to go wherever you want.” He didn’t just say it with confidence but in a matter-of-fact tone of voice. No, this was a statement of fact, much like how he assured me on a Friday back in the hospital in CT that something would be worked out by the following Monday. That’s because he knew he was going to surprise me with the ticket to Arizona.

But “wherever” I want? That’d take quite a bit of money. Yet even though I know they’re far from poor, it’s hard to believe they’d leave me that much. The economy has affected their store, and like it or not, it costs a lot of money to get old, need tons of medication/doctor visits, then die. I just would’ve thought all this, even if they haven’t yet gotten to the dying part, would clean out most of their savings. Then again, if they’re talking about leaving us enough money to get to where we want to live, vs. enough to get there and also to buy a place, that’d be different. 10-15 grand would comfortably get us across. But if they’re thinking houses as well as transport money, then we’re talking around 50K. No way. Just no way. I simply can’t see them having that much to leave. If I’d been an only child, then the sale of their condo, store and vehicles may be close to that but not with two other mistakes of theirs in the picture. BIG mistakes.

Come on, big bro, you can have a nice big fat deadly heart attack, can’t you? Come on, big sis, see all those pills you have to take? Why don’t you be a good girl and swallow the whole damn bottle? ALL of them.

I was glad to hear from Maliheh last night who’s alive but not well. She’s been having problems with her knee and shoulder, but at least she’s not homeless. She definitely doesn’t seem like herself these days, though. It’s like she’s losing more and more of her energy. Even she said she’s crashing early and getting up late. She used to be so full of spunk but now it’s like the life is drained out of her and as she herself put it, she doesn’t care if the world ends at the end of the year like some people believe it will. It’s kind of sad seeing her go downhill like this. Who knows if it’s a permanent thing that’s just going to get worse or if she’ll perk up and feel better at some point? I mean, she’s only coming up on 55. Well, 55 isn’t exactly over the hill. She used to love to chat for hours with me night after night. She said she misses that, too.

The propane people are coming tomorrow. Propane’s only down a dime a gallon. It won’t drop significantly till the spring. So the 100 gallons we’ll be getting will cost $260. As warm as the winter’s been so far and since it’s now February, it should easily last well into the spring unless it starts raining on us like crazy like I sometimes wish it would. But I also like sunshine, saving propane by not having to run heat during the daytime, and being able to open windows and air the place out.

In less than two hours I heard Jesse come and go twice. Still can’t figure out if someone’s staying with him or if this one guy just has that many places to go. The vehicles and chainsaws are putting the dogs to shame lately. Really, the mutts are quite comatose in comparison. Now, though, he’s really driving me crazy with that fucking bulldozer of his. How can the drive possibly need bulldozing when it’s barely rained half a dozen times in months??? I swear if this guy has nothing to do he makes something up and finds something to do just to be outside and annoying. Why can’t he sit on his ass indoors in front of the TV or something like that like most guys would love to do? I’m just so sick of having to hear from this one guy every single day of the week! I really hope we do get to move this summer but that’s what we thought last summer, so I don’t want to get my hopes up. For now, I have the music blasting. That bulldozer is so thunderously loud that not even earplugs could block the sound. I suppose the motorcycle is next, followed by either the dirt bike or ATV. Maybe even both. Really, what’s the point of being out here if I’ve got to listen to all this shit???

I just looked and it says it’s going to rain again on Tuesday. So what’s the point of doing all this today? I know we’ve been having a drought but it isn’t May either. May is when the rain stops for 4-5 months so why can’t he wait till then? And why can’t it just rain and rain and rain?! I’d still have to hear the truck come and go a lot, but that would eliminate the Harley and the bullshitter for a while.

Later…

I hope tomorrow won’t be as noisy as it was today. Today was as noisy as it would be back when Jesse was still working and the dogs would bark 10 hours a day. First Jesse was going in and out with the damn truck, then bulldozing for a couple of hours. Then just when I thought I might catch some peace around here, our little chainsaw fanatic starts up for a few more hours in back.

Obviously, it’s not trees they’re sawing. Not only are the other parcels of land adjacent to this one smaller than this one, but even if the property was as big, by now they should’ve run out of trees to cut for as long as this has been going on! They’ve been doing this nearly every day for months now. It’s got to be some sort of outdoor workshop or project they’re building.

The rat’s cuteness helped make up for some of the annoyances and frustrations. I threw my sneakers on so that pulling on the resistance bands when working out wouldn’t hurt my feet, and since I was only doing a few exercises I didn’t bother to tie the laces. I was doing a side raise with one leg and the rat was jumping up and down like a kitten trying to catch the dangling laces, LOL. His little paws were flailing as he attempted to catch them and it was so funny:)

I’m amazed at how well these decorative nail stickers hold up. It’s been nearly a week since I stuck one on my thumb and it’s still holding on strong even with no topcoat or sealer of any kind.

Still don’t know what the future holds for me as far as what blogging sites I may use and under what name. I kind of like it on Facebook. I don’t get the fun of tracking or surprising visitors/comments since I can’t post publicly cuz of the troll, but I like how I can decide who sees what entries I post. On other sites, it’s either private, friends only or public. But sometimes I just don’t want to share certain posts with everyone on my friend list. Besides, I’m really loving the break I get from the sicko in Texas. So I don’t know if I’ll ever pick up with my old blogs on my-diary and MyOpera as myself, or start anew on some site like thoughts.com under a pen name and use aliases for friends and family. Everybody’s names would have to be changed if I did that. Even if I didn’t identify myself, she’d know it was me just by the names of the people I mentioned. I might even have to keep my location secret as well.

sighs Damn trolls!

Later…

Maliheh got a good laugh from the funny pictures I sent her last night but that still doesn’t explain why I never got notice of her picking up postcards. Then again, there can only be two reasons why. She either didn’t pick them up or I wasn’t notified.

We got a little rain that hopefully won’t clear up too much by the afternoon. That’s when Jesse prefers to gun his Harley, turn it off, gun it again a few minutes later, roar off on it, then return just a few minutes later and make me wonder once again if someone else who also has a motorcycle and a loud vehicle lives there now.

I’m hearing these mysterious thumps like slamming car doors. Jesse would be like most people too, and slam the shit out of doors. He did when I was up at his place and he was coming and going from here when he was working on the heater/pipes.

I’m going from thinking Maliheh’s “Naning” me to wondering if something could seriously be wrong. As in her being homeless. I sent another “test” card to her yesterday and it too, wasn’t picked up. I can’t believe the notifier would fail to alert me that many times if they had been picked up. Her student count was really dropping and I know she was in some sort of dispute with her landlord about her lease, so I’m worried she could be on the streets. She’s not just a loner, but everyone hates her cuz she’s such a bitch and so she wouldn’t have anyone to help her.

I cleaned the living room and bedroom today so I have nothing left to do for the rest of the week but the bathroom and laundry. Of course, I’m always busier on weekends.

I noticed that Nane switched her posts to friends of friends, then public, then back to friends of friends since she dumped me. It’s like she’s keeping in touch without keeping in touch. Well, it’s hard to believe it’s got nothing to do with me, anyway.

So I decided why not return the favor? I changed my posts to friends of friends as well, careful to customize our “iChats” and filter most people out of visibility range. I didn’t realize at first that friends could also see what their friends can see. Furthermore, I made a point of casually mentioning this on Irene and Christiane’s walls, hoping she’ll see at least one of them.

I went into hiding again after being dumb enough to idle on FB while doing other things. That’s when the drama queen jumped out and me. So did Jessie, though it was nice touching base with her since it’d been a while. It’s just that I’m sick of how either no one wants to chat or they all want to chat at once. I’ve never been a fan of live chats anyway as opposed to email and messages.

I’ve received many compliments in life, but few have brought tears to my eyes like my good friend Monica did last night when she told me I was the reason she was saving for a Kindle reader. What a compliment that was! This was after I offered to email her some older stories that I have no plans to publish until she gets a Kindle which she had mentioned wanting to get. She had to buy the PDF format of my first book, but I’m not going to be publishing through Smashwords anymore because the lack of sales there makes the effort simply not worth it. Amazon is much more popular.

Tom and Andy said the same thing she told me about not giving up, and Andy pointed out that Fleetwood Mac didn’t make it big till their 10th album. The only problem is that I want the fortune, not the fame. But the two tend to go hand in hand, I’m afraid, though I don’t even need a fortune. Just enough to live on would be nice:) Probably just a dream, but nice.

Got up at the crack of dawn. Another day of vroom, vroom, vroom… buzz, buzz, buzz… with maybe a few woofs thrown in. And those little pig worries playing on the back of my mind, of course. :-( But I’d rather vroom, buzz, woof than oink, oink, oink.

In a chipper mood and looking pretty fashionable for a work-at-home housewife with no plans to go anywhere today.

I really hope last night’s dream was as meaningless as can be. Especially with my accuracy rate for seeing bad dreams play out in real life. Or at least something bad plays out after a bad dream. He was laid off in the dream and we were in some kind of fancy shelter, as funny as that may sound. Tom assured me the dream was too silly and ridiculous to mean anything. I hope so! But yeah, the shelter had beds much as you’d find in a hotel. You had a double bed, a nightstand and a round table that could be made “private” by pulling a curtain around the area like you would in a hospital room. Instead of being in a large room, it was long and narrow and carpeted. Our “room” was at the front end across from where someone sat at a desk.

I looked at the bed at one point to decide which side I wanted to sleep on. I chose the side closest to the table where the iPod would sit that didn’t even remotely resemble an iPod in the dream.

Then I stepped outside the curtain and looked out a large window to see a confused woman driver stalling in the middle of an intersection, unsure of where to go and pissing off fellow motorists.

Suddenly Tom and I were outside and we seemed to be stuck down in Arizona. Not a very safe place for whites to be, especially if those bullies with badges try to mess with you, but that’s where I “sensed” we were. I made a comment about there not being any birds around and Tom told me they all went to New York, LOL.

Again, I hope this dream isn’t a warning of anything bad to come. Although it’s been busy at work, we’re coming up to around the time when he would be laid off if that were going to happen. Besides, in the 4½ years we’ve been in this state we haven’t been allowed to have more than 6 months of smooth sailing at a time. He just learned that you can apply for permanent positions where he works. The only problem is that they’re minimum-wage jobs and he would have to take a hefty pay cut. Better to make more money as a temp than a little as a permanent, at least for now.

Tom says it’s getting close to where you can get a job in just a couple of weeks as was the case when we moved to Oregon in 2004 and here in 2007, but I think if he got laid off I may be tempted to just shove everything we could possibly fit into the car and head for Nebraska. I’d rather it not happen, though!

It’s just that I spent 30 or 40 bucks yesterday having fun at Kmart and Goodwill. We both still do like to shop and live life every now and then. We ate at KFC, too.

I got a couple of really colorful necklaces and this really cool bundle of bangles with glittery water inside of clear tubes with splashes of color. I don’t suppose most people my age would care for them, but I’ve always liked shiny and colorful things.

One of the coolest things I got is these decorative nail decals that you simply stick on. They seem to hold up quite well, too. I almost got kids’ nails that you glue on since my fingers/nails are so small, but I never cared for those things anyway.

I saw a really nice pair of boots I’m going to go back for at some point so long as everything continues to go well for us. They were black, low-cut boots without much of a heel. They’d look great in the winter when it’s too cold for sandals. I’d wear them with jeans and dressier tops that would look funny with sneakers.

I also saw a couple of pairs of earrings I liked. I may not have to have the lobe on my “fake” ear re-pierced if I just stick to danglies, something I like better anyway because the weight of them makes the lobes look less uneven. For now, I’ve got small silver studs in to help keep the bad one open. As usual, the earring went in quickly and painlessly in the good ear, but it took me several minutes of fighting with the bad ear to get the damn thing in as it’s been several weeks since I wore earrings. I’ve got to be sure to leave them in longer this time as ridiculous as I think they look with the way the bad side has sort of curled upward with time, making that earring seem higher and tilted compared to the other. If the danglies are big enough, though, like the ones I saw and liked, it looks more natural.

At the Goodwill store, Tom got a digital camera, only the lady was kindly dumb enough to charge him just $2 for the case, not realizing there was a $12 camera inside it. He got it not because we need a digital camera (we already have one) but because he wanted the parts for another electronics project he’s working on.

For just a few bucks I found the perfect shower hooks with a flower design on them, so I took advantage of that and snatched a setup. Now, instead of those pain-to-use plastic snap-rings that break so easily, we have metal, easy-to-use hooks.

So other than a 99-cent body spray, a pack of Rain Garden incense, and a Bergamot Tea diffuser for the closet, that’s all we got. Fun, reasonable and much deserved, but I still feel a tinge of guilt anyway.

The laptop is all screwed up and super slow so Tom’s going to strip it sometime. All I use it for anyway is backing up stuff and playing music (it’s hooked to the stereo).

I gave people the email address I’m going to start using but must keep my old one active for a few more weeks till my other Facebook account is deleted. That way I can switch my main Facebook account over to the email address the other one is using. Deactivating doesn’t do me any good because signing in with the addy I want to use simply wakes that account up. So I submitted a deletion request.

Later…

The Jes pest just left in his insanely loud truck just a few minutes ago. I couldn’t tell if he had the dogs with him but I haven’t heard a single bark since he left. So he’s either got them with him or someone’s at the house. Sometimes I wonder if he got a roommate and if that could be part of the uptick in loud vehicles. If he’s hard up for bucks as we suspect he is it may make the idea of a roommate rather desirable to him.

As we were coming back yesterday, I looked at Tom and said, “Watch, now that we’re back we’ll have to hear Jesse. I’m sure it was dead quiet while we were out and that he was just waiting for us to get back.”

Sure enough, barely 15 minutes later he was gunning the Harley on and off.

Yesterday, it got up to 83° in the living room with the windows open. 79° in the bedroom with the window open and fan on. The heat should be off for the day now and in a couple of hours, the windows should once again be open. It’s nice to get some fresh air in here.

So now that I’ve decided to dump my Yahoo account now the spamarama trip stops. There’s still enough of it hitting the spam box, but I had been on a roll where a dozen or more messages a day weren’t being filtered out.

I asked Tom why it’s so important to close certain accounts and to stop public blogging if I’m out of the jurisdiction and he said it’s to untangle the past from the future. At first I didn’t get what he was saying till I realized that right now it’s very possible they could be looking for anything they can get me with. And if they can get me with something in the future that’s connected to the past, such as Google, the stem of all this bullshit, things could turn federal if they create enough “evidence.” It goes without saying that if they can fabricate a so-called case against me, they could fabricate – oh shit! Just when I thought I could enjoy some more peace until Jesse’s return, up they start with the damn saws. Those FUCKING MOTHER FUCKING SAWS! A few times a month was fine. But lately, it’s been a few times a week or more and by God is it getting old!

Back to the freeloaders, pigs and all things related. If they can bullshit up a case, they can bullshit up more evidence to compound things and make it into a bigger deal than they already made it out to be; big enough to possibly come after me with. That’s what happened the last time. But this time I do still have a few things in my favor I didn’t have 12 years ago besides more knowledge pertaining to Arizona’s barbaric laws and sentences. That’s the fact that they have no phone calls, no physical evidence, and they can’t summon AT&T for info because the net’s not in our name here. The best they could do is follow me online from here on out which they may or may not be doing.

Can I please stop shitting now? Really, what the hell’s wrong with me that I’ve had to shit 3 times when I’ve only been up for 7 hours. Barely.

It may sound funny but I feel more “exposed” here. Not in these woods, in this trailer. If anyone came snooping around it’d be hard to hide in here even with the blinds drawn and no sounds coming from inside. The slats on the blinds don’t close tightly enough and there are little peepholes along the edges and through the cutouts for the drawcords. The bathroom has a translucent window, but if I ran in there with the door open, they could see me through the blinds in the door across from the bathroom door. If I shut the door, they’d see that and think someone was probably here and in the bathroom. I guess I could run and hide in the closet if I saw any pigs lurking about, but IDK. sighs I don’t want to hide in the bedroom or have any of my movements and day-to-day living revolve around what the pigs may do. That only makes me feel more controlled and like they’ve won. They won before and I’m determined to do all I can never to let them win again. To never control our money, where we live, what we do, what I eat, what I wear, or when I can shower (in cold water). But that’s just the thing. I do have to be somewhat cautious so that they don’t win again. We can’t control whatever it is they did to make it appear as though they have a legitimate case against me, assuming it isn’t the scam it likely is. All we can do is control the future.

Keeping sounds from being heard outside these flimsy walls is hard, too. The floors can be heard creaking outside the place even from a light person walking slowly and gently. The washing machine can be heard easily and dishes clanking when I wash dishes. Tom’s snoring, toilet-flushing, faucets running, sound machines… one can hear it all if they’re right outside the place.

It’s just after 11:00 and Jesse just got back. Let me guess…it’s gonna roar out on the Harley next, right? Or will it bulldoze or ATV around the land instead?

Anyway, I’m trying not to worry about the freeloaders, pigs and layoffs, but it’s hard at times. The job’s not that big of a concern. But the pigs? I guess that will depend on how obsessed they are with me. Unfortunately, the pigs that usually work these so-called cases aren’t just bullies with badges but freeloading minorities who quite often dislike whites. So I’ve got a hater determined to legally “get” me on behalf of another hater. I just hope I’m not a very high priority on their hate list.

Even Tom’s going to eventually shut his own Gmail account down even though it hasn’t been implicated in anything, just so there are no more Google connections. Whether or not I’ll ever return to public blogging, where, and under what name is still unknown and undecided at this time. I miss it and I miss seeing who comes around, but I’m totally loving the break it’s given me from the trolls.

At first I didn’t want to do anything that could make me look guilty and like I have something to hide, but as Tom says, it doesn’t matter. He’s right and I don’t care how shutting down accounts makes me look. It isn’t appearances that matter, it’s the pigs’ actions, and I will do whatever it takes to protect myself from the badged bastards.

Ok, here comes the spamfest. Yes, I do feel better once again about deleting my Yahoo account.

I don’t get Andy sometimes. I know I should let others believe what they believe as we can’t help what we believe anyway. But sometimes he seems to make excuses for God’s unfairness towards him. IDK, it sorta reminds me of a woman making excuses for an abusive man. I just wish he would see God for His true colors. He said maybe God’s keeping him alone to protect him from diseases. But wouldn’t it just be simple enough to send him someone clean? To that, he said God works in mysterious ways. More like cruel and unfair ways if you ask me. Why is it so important to God that Andy be lonely all his life? Why is it important to Him that we spend most of our time struggling? Why it is important to Him that Alison has all kinds of health problems?

On the flip side, he pointed out that he is very blessed in other areas and considers himself 90% happy. That’s how I feel right now, too. The only thing spoiling these better days is knowing that the shit’s gonna hit the fan sooner or later and we’ll be right back to struggle our asses off and give God (or whatever may be up there) a good laugh while He watches us scramble to save our asses.

Later…

LOL, Christiane commented on a post of Nane’s bitching about the weather (-13º). I noticed she changed her posting visibility from public to friends of friends when she dumped me. Now they’re back to public. Wonder if Christiane took the time to tell Nane about the bullshit chat of ours I posted for select eyes only, particularly hers and Irene’s. It would be especially funny if she or Irene copied it for her:) Hmm… what shall we “chat” about next? LMAO!

Soon it’s off to work on my book and to let “Bunny Nose” and her devilish side come out to play as every good book deserves at least one good sociopath:)

Irene said there was an earthquake in Salzburg as well as northern Italy and that she felt her desk shaking at work. I didn’t even know they could get earthquakes there. I guess Nane didn’t feel it up in Munich? Either way, I got to learn a new word while I was at it – Erdbeben. That’s German for the word earthquake.

Irene seems to want to hook me up with one of her friends. In her twisted English, I got the sense that maybe the friend was from here. She mentioned Westwood. I told her to tell her she’s welcome to send me a friend invite and I’ll add her if she wants.

Got lots to do this weekend so I may not get much writing done on either journals or stories. Then again, I always have lots to do. It’s just that weekends are more for laundry and errands while weekdays are more for writing, housecleaning and working out. Today, though, I’m going to clean the bathroom while he does the grocery shopping. Then we’re going to do even more PC configuring and try to “build” one of the Mac word processors to suit my needs and tastes by altering their basic code, something anyone can do.

Tom said a tree went down by Jesse’s place yesterday. That may explain some of the coming and going I heard like half a dozen times yesterday.

Later…

It’s only the afternoon here but already I am exhausted from all the changes we’ve been making on my computer both on and offline. We killed my Gmail accounts since I don’t use them anymore. I’m also going to be deleting my account with Yahoo but will be sure to PM my top buddies with the new addy. It’s actually not a “new” addy, just one I haven’t used to enter sweepstakes with thus encouraging a ton of spammers and scammers.

Still wish it would rain away the chainsaws, motorcycles and dogs, but at least we save on propane this way. It’s so nice in the afternoons that it’s been getting up to around 80º in here in the afternoons. The nights and mornings are still cold, though. Right now I’ve got shorts and a sports bra on. You’d never know I was bundled up in my robe less than 6 hours ago.

Maliheh never picked up either postcard that I know of so now I don’t know what to think. My gut feeling is that she’s ignoring both cards. Maybe she somehow knows I’ll know it if she picks them up. Then again she could be out on the streets or back in Hawaii with a dying mother. Who the hell knows and frankly I don’t know if I care anymore. Keeping in touch once every week or two wasn’t much to ask for, was it? As of the first, I’m not sending any more journals she may not be getting until I hear from her. Enough of this one-sided friendship and feeling like I’m talking to a wall!

Jesse was quiet till 10:30 yesterday when I heard him come in in the truck. Because I hadn’t heard any barking all morning I figured he took the dogs with him or someone was at the house. But the instant he got in he came right back out to play. Yes, he just had to jump on the bulldozer until it rained. If he had any brains he’d wait to go bullshitting in May or June, but no, this boy just has to play with his toys. The rain was an unexpected surprise, but now the 5-cast is once again predicting nothing but sunny days.

The rat has been clingier lately for some reason. It’s cute but annoying at times the way he follows me around the place. He sure wouldn’t let me work out earlier. No, instead he just had to chase and play with the resistance bands I was trying to work with, LOL. Anyway, the attention junkie should sleep most of the day away now that he’s had his love, attention, treats, freedom and exercise.

And I’ll spend the day worrying. Especially after the dream, I had last night. Tom says there’s nothing to worry about and while I don’t have a sense of foreboding, it still worries one who’s prone to dream premonitions, and well, I worry if last night’s dream was a nasty sign of some kind.

In the dream, I worked in an office building (dreams and stories are the only places I can keep a schedule). I had a small office at the end of the hall and was in a much larger room next to it when I spotted these two detectives. I don’t know if I’d met them before or not but I somehow knew they were there for me. The one leading the way was a white, middle-aged guy who was kind of baldish and carrying a manila envelope. His partner might have been a younger non-white. Maybe skinnier and a touch taller, too.

The wall that ran along the hallway was mostly made of glass. I watched through the “window” as the guys spoke to a secretary who sat at her desk facing the room in this little nook-like area across the hall. She pointed toward my office and they headed to it just 20 or so yards down the hall.

The storage room or whatever it was I was in suddenly turned into a bedroom. A large bed stood against the center of the wall opposite the windows and I suddenly dropped to the floor and pressed myself against the side of the bed, unable to get much more than an arm and a leg underneath it. Then I realized someone would surely spot me and wonder what the hell I was doing lying on the floor. Jumping back up to my feet I ran out of the room and through the nearest door which was a bathroom. When the pigs saw I wasn’t in my office, I heard them come out and ask the secretary where I was. I didn’t think I’d been seen, but she said I was in the bathroom and I woke up as they said they’d wait for me.

Tom better be right about this whole jurisdiction thing! It’s just that I fear that since I know damn well and good that I never did anything wrong enough to give them a “case” other than say some things they wouldn’t agree with that they’ve gone and made a case against me. As in falsifying evidence in a way that could make jurisdiction not matter. I really think someone altered one of my emails to make it sound threatening. Damn me again for sending them!

But does the dream mean anything? Is it a sign saying they’re “closing in” on me? Are they planning on coming here or am I just going to get a threatening message of sorts saying something like either come forward now or else!

Well, the facts still stand. I have done nothing wrong other than express myself in a non-threatening way and I have nothing to say to the pigs. Just because some people don’t want to hear it and may be easily offended – hey, I didn’t force anyone to read anything. The fact that she couldn’t just hit the delete button or block me or mark me as spam is not my problem. It never will be my problem either. Sorry, bitch but whatever’s up there is going to be protecting me this time. It fed me to you once and this time it’s my back it’s got. How do I know this? I don’t for sure. It’s just a feeling. Maybe it doesn’t have my back at all any more than it did when it let her and several others shit on me. Maybe it’s me and my husband that has my back, and you know what? This time it’s going to be enough!

Anyway, I don’t want to spend my time writing about how I’m not going to fall for their shit this time around and how much I’ll sue or kill but definitely make them sorry they didn’t just ignore me. I want to go work on my story soon.

Damn! Not even the first month of the year is through yet and I’ve already written 50 pages!

Why has my hard drive been so noisy today? I don’t know enough about this Mac crap yet to be able to see what it’s doing but I hope it’s just scanning or updating and that I haven’t been hacked! I’m so paranoid about that after having 3 emails, 2 blogs, and 1 PC hacked.

Later…

It’s barely after 11am and already I’ve heard Jesse come and go 3 times. Does he have a roommate with a similar vehicle or what? I mean, if it’s just him, how many places could a guy possibly have to go so damn often? This, and constant company, would be my biggest concern being in an adult community. They just don’t stay put at any age. And they’re all company junkies!

Let me guess… now it’s time to play on the bulldozer, right? Why doesn’t he just zoom out on the Harley and leave me with the barking instead?

Again Andy had a porn pic removed from Formspring which he posted as my “punishment” for not making him laugh when I told him about them tipping Nane off about the LM prank. But it was funny. He said it wasn’t, though, cuz that’s what mutual friends do – talk. This was after just days of promising to “try harder” to post more pics I like. But as I knew all along, he’s got an obvious porn addiction going. That’s not the mystery. The mystery is why they just keep removing the pics and not sending him a verbal warning or kicking him off. They removed the pic pretty damn fast, too. Makes me wonder if Andy not only wants to get kicked off, but if someone’s allowing him to stay because of me. Maybe I’ve really gotten beyond paranoid with this theory. So far beyond it that I make Marie seem like she wasn’t paranoid at all. But really, what if? What if the pigs told them, “Look just deal with it for now. Just remove the dirty pics but don’t kick him off because we’re really interested in what one of his friends has to say.”

Again, I would hate to think they’d put their time and effort into what I have to say versus their local child molesters and wife-beaters, but so be it. That’s just our backward world for you. If I farted they’d be interested in me. But if I axed someone’s head off they couldn’t care less.

Ok, I’ve had it with this in-and-out shit. Time to get the wax plugin. Sad when you can’t even get any peace out in the country. Really sad.

Still trying to come to terms with the fact that I’m never going to lose weight. Never. And that’s because I won’t starve myself or cut down enough that I feel like I am. But it’s true, no matter how much exercising I do, I will always be around 140 pounds or higher.

I do like how good working out makes me feel, though. I love having all this muscle! I’ve been “lifting” like crazy. Each exercise helps with more than just the target areas. Running doesn’t just work the legs but firms the hips as well. Ab crunching also helps the neck and chin area so they’re less droopy. With age, the neck tends to drape down just above the collarbone but mine’s not doing that.

It’s back to being nice during the daytime and cold at night. Sooner or later I would think the rains will make their way back into the area and it will be cold night and day. I’m sick of the cold and it’s not even February yet! Damn, I hope we make it to Florida someday. I really do.

It’s too soon to say for sure but my nails do seem to be a bit clearer. The milky color has faded, and while my fingernails now look ok save for ridges, a few of my toenails still look discolored.

Tom’s back to having OT so hopefully, that means they won’t lay him off anytime soon.

I asked Teri and she advised me to do 3 sets of my muscle-building exercises and to do as many reps as I can until I can do no more. She said to rest for 3-5 minutes in between. Also, up the resistance if I have to do that many reps. So I’m now at 20 pounds and will work my way up to 30 which is as much as I’ve got here as far as resistance bands go.

If we ever make it out of here I think the only thing I’m gonna miss about this place is the cabinet support pole I’ve been using to do some of the exercises with. I could probably wrap bands around the treadmill’s rails, though, too. That’s what I have to do in order to work the inner thigh muscles. Anyway, all this “lifting” takes time and between that and the treadmill, I don’t care to spend nearly two hours a day working on myself, so I’m alternating between muscle and cardio workouts. I just hope it’s enough to get more weight off since the muscle pumping doesn’t get the heart pumping nearly as much as running does. Even walking briskly at 3MPH gets it going faster than when I’m lifting.

I messaged Jasmine from the old KB on FB yesterday but didn’t hear back from her even though she’s posted to her wall since then. I just thought I’d say hi but she didn’t like me very much in the end because of my views on blacks and the unfairness of reverse discrimination.

Maliheh not only still hasn’t messaged me but hasn’t picked up her Webshots card. Their notification thing is glitchy at times, though, so she still may’ve gotten it. As a test, I’m sending another Egreeting card. We’ll see if she picks up that today or if I at least get anything saying she did. I’ll have mixed emotions if I see she’s picked up this card. It would be a good thing because it would show she’s alive and well and is taking the time to read what I send. But it would convince me all the more that no matter what she says is going on in her life, she is ignoring me for some reason.

I sent Barbara a card yesterday and she didn’t pick it up, but she did pick up the one I sent before. Yeah, I’m definitely not going to hear from her again. No doubt about that one.

The troll’s worrying Alison with more and more talk about moving to Des Moines which is just a 3½-hour drive from the Omaha area. She fears something bad will happen if she makes the move, though I don’t see what could possibly happen. The troll can’t drive and if she’s got this supposed muscle condition which is part of why she can’t drive or run too well, then how could she hurt Aly? She’s crazy, but hopefully not crazy enough to get her BF, who’s got to be just as sick as she is, to drive her over to Alison’s and also a gun with which to shoot her. After all, I did say I sensed she’d be dangerous if she were in better shape and could get around easier.

Part of what seems to be motivating the troll is that right after she praised her family and said, “Who needs friends when you have such a wonderful family?” she’s not getting along with her parents and is fighting with her sisters as well. Her mother’s afraid to let her go for fear of her not taking her BC pills. Molly needs more than just BC pills, even though I can’t imagine her ever surviving for long in any long-term relationship, she needs her plumbing ripped out. She’s just the kind our twisted God would have knocked up, too. Just what the world needs – baby Mollys to add to the world’s craziness.

I’m trying to understand the world’s crazies just out of sheer curiosity. I mean what makes them tick? I know many things can contribute to one becoming a sociopath, a serial killer, and just plain crazy. But what’s the scoop in Molly’s case? Was it abuse that made her the way she is? Genetics? Something else? And just what does “crazy” mean? Does she even know what she’s doing? Sometimes I think she does because she has admitted in her blog to making threats and doing other things she shouldn’t be doing, but most of the time she seems to have no concept of right and wrong. Can she really tell the difference but is unable to keep herself from doing the shit she does anyway? Is she too out of it most of the time to realize her mistakes? Or is she fully aware at all times but just doesn’t give a shit?

Anyway, I think Mommy Dearest is worried about more than just BC. I think she not only knows the relationship won’t last, but she worries about just what kind of trouble her demented daughter may cause being so far away where she has no control over at least some of it. I think she fears she won’t take her psych pills and will eventually get in trouble with the law. I still can’t believe she hasn’t as of yet. Really, what’s taking so long?

Still editing and sprucing up my timeline and I’m sure I’ll make changes and additions for some time to come as I remember past events and stuff like that. What sucks is knowing they’ll just revamp the damn profile layouts again soon enough.

I wonder if Facebook is glitchy because it not only continued to say I have 37 notes after I posted one, but they’re saying I joined in October of 2007. But I swear I joined a year or two before that up in Oregon. I swear I remember changing my state of residence from Oregon to Cali.

They also say I have zero activity for 2008. It’s hard to believe I didn’t post or do something.

Since the new timeline makes it so much easier to see so much at once, I easily scrolled back to some posts Nane left over a year ago and couldn’t resist “liking” one. LOL, that’s gonna throw the bitch off, alright, when she gets notified of it:) I don’t know that they’re timelining Germany so she’s going to have a real WTF? moment trying to figure out how I could “like” something she posted when we’re no longer friends and she hasn’t even posted on my wall for a million years anyway.

Later…

OMG, I am laughing so, so fucking hard to myself right now I almost spit coffee out all over me! It’s a good thing Tom isn’t home now. I wouldn’t want to worry my lovable but sometimes paranoid husband into thinking I’m getting into trouble. Oh, it’s nothing illegal, but it’s so damn funny. I’ve got to make sure I only share this with Andy. We’re the only ones who have this much in common. We’re two pranksters at heart. I may have no desire to make prank calls, but oh the fun I have online at times! Only Andy would probably find what I’m about to say funny whereas Maliheh, Aly and everyone else would either be like, “Shame on you!” Or they just wouldn’t get it.

I’m friends with two of Nane’s friends right now, Christiane and Irene. Well, except for emails to Andy and Maliheh, Facebook is the only place I’ve been journaling lately. In fact, it’s pretty much the only site I hang out on these days except for when I play around with Andy on his Formspring page.

Anyway, I went to Live Mocha, the site Nane and I “met” on. Neither of us has been into LM for quite a while now. Nane’s third language is Turkish. She’s not fluent in it but has studied quite a bit of it. Especially since she vacations in Turkey 3-4 times a year and hopes to one day live there. LM is a social site as well as a language learning site where native speakers of whatever language you’re learning can leave you tips and correct any errors you make. So I went to an old spoken Turkish exercise of hers and after using Google to translate from English to Turkish, I left a “review” about just what I think about her dumping me and all that. No swears or threats or anything illegal, but nothing she’d be too thrilled about.

Only problem was she hadn’t logged in since August 23rd. Then I got curious as to whether or not Christiane or Irene might be reading my notes and decided to do a little test. I casually mentioned Nane and said that I still missed her at times even though I knew we were better off not speaking to each other, though she’s “probably going to want to strangle me for the Livemocha prank if she ever discovers it.” I was not only curious as to whether or not they may be reading my notes, but I kinda hoped they were and that they’d go tip Nane off so Nane could go see my little Turk prank. Hey, they gave me 20 free tokens to do it, LOL, not that I’m very active there any more than she’s been. I’ve taken all the courses I care to take until and if they ever add Hawaiian.

I posted this note a few days ago for them only even though they didn’t know it was for them only. But yeah, that’s the beauty of posting on FB; you can hide select friends from seeing certain posts or make them available to certain friends. However way you wanna go. Well, they didn’t say anything about it, but I just discovered that Nane deactivated her account, hahaha! The timing is quite a coincidence if you ask me, LMAO!

The thought of posting notes just for Christiane and Irene about Nane and I making up and even talking about visiting, knowing they’ll run and tell her about it, really amuses the hell out of me. :))))) OMG, I can’t stop laughing!

She also removed the ‘friends of friends’ weather post the other day. Now just the public post is there.

I had a dream a few nights ago that Facebook forced the new timeline profile on everyone and I shut down my account and left for good. Then Tom read an article this morning confirming that they were going to do just that – force it on everyone as of the first (unless you want to change over sooner).

I noticed a few people already switched to the timeline but at first it seemed complex and didn’t interest me. The layout seemed sloppy and too cluttered at first glance so I shied away from it. Besides, I’m a hater of change for the most part. When I get used to doing something a certain way and get comfortable with it, I like to stick to it and not bother to change what works well enough for me.

So when Tom told me they were making it mandatory anyhow, I said okay, let me go check it out, see how much I hate it, then deactivate my account. However, I’m surprised to say that I like it very much and it really is simple to set up and navigate once you get the hang of it. It makes it much more convenient to jump from year to year instead of having to scroll and scroll and scroll down to the earlier stuff.

So only half of that dream has come true since I’m going to stick around after all!

Why did Kevin E. request to follow me on Twitter, especially since I almost never tweet anymore? I’d never heard of him before but he’s some kind of songwriter and musician according to my research. I’m used to authors following me, but a songwriter and musician? I haven’t been into the music scene for decades. I still sing at times, but I haven’t danced or touched a guitar other than the ones I won long enough to sell since my mid-20s.

He’s following nearly 1000 people, has 11 followers mostly in the entertainment business, but hasn’t tweeted. The account looks legit, though, as did the guy who sent me an add invite on FB since I saw that we have 4 mutual friends (VH sisters) and he’s in the northeast and is around my age.

Couldn’t help but think of Maliheh when I saw this site that sells stone guitar picks. Someone tried to tell me they were made of dinosaur bones. Yeah, right. And my nose is made of Adolf Hitler’s last dump before he killed himself. LOL, how the hell can you play with picks made of stone anyway?

I can’t believe Andy hasn’t been banned from Formspring. They keep removing the hardcore porn pics he posts but he just won’t stop posting them. It’s like he’s addicted to the stuff. Or to grossing some people out. Yesterday he said he’d stick to soft porn. Yeah, right. For how long, 3 days?

The troll is already back to badmouthing Alison. I suppose I’m next, and then Kim and Kathy, more of her imaginary friends that she doesn’t get why they won’t talk to her. We knew it wouldn’t take long, though. What mommy doesn’t seem to get is that temporary punishment and banning her from the net won’t cut it. She’ll not only just carry on her shit from the library whenever she can, but will be right back to her threats and harassment as soon as mommy gives her back her computer. Mrs. M just doesn’t get that she needs to be kept from going online FOREVER or at least with someone looking over her shoulder and watching her every single move without so much as blinking an eye.

Aly’s review of Renting Ginny was very helpful. She’s the absolute best editor I have. Mitch is great, too. The only problem there is the UK/US English differences. Over here we simply do not spell color with a ‘u’ in it.

Although I have the basic ideas mapped out for Bunny Nose and will be starting C3 today, I’m not so sure just how evil I want to make “Bunny Nose” just yet. That would certainly be a cause of concern for the kind elderly couple that takes her in if others witness her doing crazy and even violent things. Or should another character be the nutcase? Every story deserves to have at least one batshit crazy character:)

Time to work out because no, I will not use my period as an excuse to be lazy. Then I’ll hit the shower in which the hot water still runs out too soon which means it’s something about this screwy shower itself or the pipes and not the tank. A 35-gallon tank should definitely not run out of hot water in less than 15 minutes.