We were gone for about 8 hours yesterday, but the car won’t be fixed until today. At least, we think it’ll be fixed today. He said that because we just got all new tires, he wants the car to last another couple of years and that maybe we can get fences and an old pickup this fall with stock money. That all sounds good, but I still can’t imagine God allowing us fences till right before or after the probation ends.

We saw Mary, Dave and Mom right as we were leaving. While he worked on the car I hung out with Pepper and read my book. Seeing Pepper made me wish we hadn’t decided against taking him, but either way, we couldn’t take him. We don’t have fences and it’ll be a while before we do.

Because I knew I would be on a liquid diet for today and tomorrow, I didn’t hold back on helping myself to the shit they have there. It is unbelievable all the shit they have! There were 5 bowls of candy, 2 boxes of cakes, half a dozen boxes of various crackers, half a dozen boxes of various chips, and both the fridge and freezer were jam-packed with pies, ice cream, TV dinners, etc. The only healthy things were a couple of containers of yogurt and some cheese. They did have V8 drinks for mom, but everything else was soda or fruit punch. The variety of food wasn’t the only amazing thing, but so was the quantity. If I were suddenly stranded all alone in that house, I could easily get by on all that food for a month.

Anyway, I woke up at 119 pounds, and I plan on not eating till Thursday. Depending on what the scale says come Thursday morning, then I’ll decide whether or not it’s time to permanently hang up dieting (or for a long, long time) and maintain whatever I am, or if I want to starve another day or two after I’ve eaten for a day or two in between.

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What the fuck is going on here?! How could I have gained a pound since 8:00 this morning with no food? I should be down a pound or two by now, not up a pound. I didn’t shit today. Maybe that has something to do with it, but with no food, I should wake up tomorrow at 115, then at 111 on Thursday. That’s a reasonable amount of weight loss for someone who doesn’t eat for 48 hours, and I’ll be damned if I’m gonna go through this hell just to lose a few pounds in the end! I should easily lose 4 pounds a day, maybe even 5 or 6.

We checked online for any news pertaining to Mary’s trial, but there was nothing. Not one mention of it, and I had said to Tom, “Guess it’s not big news when a child is abused so long as everyone involved is the same color.”

Yet he assured me it was too soon and that no mention of it would be likely till after the testimony, the closing arguments, and the jury’s deliberation.

I really hope she’s taken to Florida before May. I really don’t want to go through the hassles of going to see her! Besides, she should be a bit more comfortable in prison, I’d think.

If Scot doesn’t show up here this week, then who knows when the fuck he will? Not for a while, I hope. I’m really sick of having to deal with anything that’s connected to these freeloaders. I want them out of our lives for good!

I hope Paula remembers to call and let me know how she makes out in court at the end of the month. I also hope she’ll contact me as soon as she can if she gets a jail sentence on her birthday. Certainly, she couldn’t get too long of a sentence. She only slugged a cop, right? I hope that pig was white!