Now that’s interesting. Someone in Laconia, NH has me bookmarked and visits my blog every now and then. Tammy just statused on Facebook that she’d love to catch up with her classmates from Longmeadow High. Why, I don’t know since all they did was pick on her.

But some guy responded saying he’s been married 30 years and is living in New Hampshire.

What surprised me was Tammy’s response to his response saying she and her husband love NH, especially the Laconia/Sugar Hill area and how they’re sick of CT and the rising costs and the way everything’s taxed there.

Since when does my sister “love” any state that’s so cold and snowy? And does she have a second home there? God would let her have enough money for that, too. I’m the one that doesn’t deserve money, remember? So yeah, I can see her owning two real houses while we have to rent a single dumpy old trailer. Either way, the Laconia hit may or may not be her. I still do know a lot of folks in NH, mostly from Valleyhead.

My mom’s 79 today. She told me she didn’t have any plans for the day. I teased her saying that at her age I could see why she wouldn’t bother, hahaha.

Once again the weather turned cold and rainy and once again the forecasters are insisting that this is “it” and that summer is now free to begin. I’ll still believe it when I see it! Come mid-June you should be able to leave windows open round the clock here until late August or early September if you’ve got a swamp cooler. Still, I hope it’s finally the end of the end of the shitty weather.

Still nothing from Nane and no way to say for sure if she’s ignoring me or just hasn’t been on Facebook. My guess is that she’s just swamped with work since she vacationed for nearly a month.

Although things aren’t bad any more than they’re good, my life has become boringly predictable. I keep busy doing the things I usually do – writing, language studies, work – but every day is basically the same. I can tell you exactly what’s going to happen tomorrow – my husband won’t get any calls for any job interviews and if he does he will be passed over for someone younger and less white (they love you if you’re young or black, but to hell with whether or not you’re competent). I’ll work on the job site for a while, I’ll enter sweeps, I’ll hope for a message from Nane that I’ll never get, and I’ll hate God a little more for not helping us out of this rut and for allowing us to continue to be held back in life, and I’ll write another chapter in my book. Maybe even listen to music, too.

As for Tom – he’ll keep filling out job applications even though there are only so many to fill out in the first place, and he too will do whatever online work is available.

Knowing I’ll be poor for the rest of my life doesn’t bother me so much anymore. You don’t need money once you’ve paid for the necessities in life. What’s got me pissed is feeling like I’m being controlled and like I’m some puppet on a string with no control over her life and no say in what happens to her. I could choose to stand in front of a semi and let it run me over but I couldn’t choose for my husband to be given a job. Why is it I can only choose bad for us???