I later got, “How do you deal with a crazy person,” and “How do you know when you’re crazy?” and “Do you ever wonder if you’re crazy?” and “Do trolls know they’re trolls?” and “Who’s crazier, you or Andy?”

So I’d say that no, it’s no one that’s been victimized by Kim. It’s just Kim. Just plain old crazy Kim. As I’ve said a thousand times, I can’t believe it. I just can’t believe it. Had I known for a minute she’d turn out this way and that she was this crazy and another obsessed stalker same as Molly, I never would’ve bothered with her, or I’d have at least let her go quietly instead of confronting her. Sometimes it’s those you least expect to be the crazy ones. Back when we were friends, as strange, slow, dumb and annoying as she could be, I’d never have guessed she’d end up pestering me like this every week or two.

Slept better last night cuz I took a Benadryl instead of that Neuro Sleep drink which caused me to wake up a lot during the night. It must contain melatonin. I got a little sneezy yesterday anyway, which tells me that slacking off on the nasal spray wasn’t such a good idea. It’s a preventative thing, so I gotta take it regularly if I don’t want allergy attacks.

I was only slightly chilly with the blanket and no fan. If I just open the vent before bed I should be fine without comforters, and Tom’s just fine with just a sheet pulled over him. We set the heat to come on between 70° and 72°. After today we’ve got a few days of rain headed our way.

We were shredding papers with sensitive material and I gave a bundle to the rats to nest in. They just love it.

My wonderful hubby is taking me to a salon for the first time in over 20 years for my birthday (and shopping) after I have my dental bridge installed. I need my hair relayered. For most of my life, I kept my hair one length and it would range between my waist and thighs. I’d only cut it every 4-5 years. I learned that the best way to avoid a bad cut (and save money) is to not bother. But now I’m sporting a shorter, layered look. It’s time to dye it again, too.

Nane suggested Strähnchen (highlights) but I don’t think those look good on curly hair.

I’m doing a variation of the Special K diet that is much easier to stick to. I eat less but more often and that helps keep the hunger down and my metabolism up. Plus a half-hour on the treadmill and 10-20 min. of arm and ab work 5-6 days a week.

Oh, and before I forget - I have been quick to bash and trash the system, from my perps to their cop friend, from my “lawyer” to the judge, and all those who had a hand in trashing my life for a while all in the name of hate, spite and revenge. Well, I don’t regret doing so for it is with just cause. However, I should point out the detention officers I dealt with while I was in jail. They felt very bad for me and treated me very well, doing all they could to make my stay as comfortable as possible. They agreed that guilty or not, no one should receive the kind of sentence I did. They were very kind to me, cracked jokes, and did their best to cheer me up along the way. Just thought I would point that out.

Later…

Years ago I got this keychain with a little red laser light on it. When we lived in a duplex in Oregon in 2004, the bathroom window faced the back of another duplex occupied by a mother and daughter. The daughter was on one side, the mother was on the other. The daughter wasn’t big on privacy. Her living room windows were right in front of the bathroom window, perhaps 10-15 feet away. There were never any window coverings on the windows.

The bathroom window was in the shower wall and I had to shower with the light off when I’d wanted to crack it at night. I liked the fresh air mingling with the hot steam.

Every night the daughter would sit on her couch facing the window. Her TV was directly below it. It was all I could do to keep from getting a little laser-happy and shining it in at her, hahaha. It would’ve been beyond perfect, too! First I’d have shined it on her, startling her and making her spill her popcorn all over the place. Then there’d be a red dot spelling “hello” on the wall behind her, hahahahaha..... SO fucking funny!!!

Sure enough, there’s been no response from Maliheh, assuming she’s picked up the message I sent a few days ago. No journal entries, just a quick message asking why I haven’t heard from her since last summer. A week after my birthday I’ll message her to “thank” her for remembering. Next month I’ll give her a piece of my mind and be as done with her as she obviously is with me.

I should’ve known this would happen and that she only befriended me to get her name out of my book. I should’ve known that if she could react the way she did to my trying to be honest with her upfront about how it would probably be best if we were just friends which she took as a “Dear John” message, that she’d lead me on and dump all over me again. I should’ve listened to my gut instinct when the first red flag went up. That was when she refused to ever call me or add me on Facebook. I thought it was strange and was like, well, since we’re friends now then why wouldn’t she add me? But I let it go and figured she had her reasons. However, not using FB much was not one of them. She tried to tell me she only checked in to see who was still alive and who died. Well, she may not use it every day, but from what I can tell, she’s pretty active enough. I then thought maybe she didn’t want to have to explain to the friends I added why I was suddenly added, and while I still thought that was kind of weird, I didn’t question it much. But now I know the REAL reason she never added me. It was because she never was a true friend and she had no intentions of pretending to be my friend forever.

Those long stretches of silence she “promised” to stop were just her playing with me. She knew what she was doing. She knew she would stay away long enough to make me start to doubt her, then claim she would “always” be my friend. Well, I’m sorry, Maliheh, but you’ve gotten rather obvious!

I was always left with a nagging are-you-sure-about-that? feeling when she insisted she never prank-called me in return, directly or not, back in MA. Then recently I was reading in my 1991 journal about how one of the callers sounded like the girl she was with in the club the night we met. Even if she hadn’t, doesn’t she realize the timing was a helluva coincidence? Who else would have pranked my unlisted number back then? The crisis center? Kim and Mark? Lori H? It’s possible, but I doubt it.

I also thought it weird that she insisted it was me who kissed her on the cheek goodbye that night when it was the other way around. I clearly remember that much. The minute I walked into the club she asked me to dance. How could one NOT think someone was interested in them after they kissed them and asked them to dance? She wasn’t falling down drunk that night, but IDK, maybe she was slightly buzzed.

She may like being alone, but I think she’s also alone because she can’t maintain a relationship without not only being the bossy bitch from hell but without the damn games mixed in as well. Just like Kim likes to be other people, Maliheh obviously likes to lead people on. Maybe she doesn’t always mean to do it, though, as she apologized for my misunderstanding her once when she said we could “get closer” after such and such a time when she was really referring to getting closer to figuring out what was wrong with her health. She also did admit she wasn’t trying to draw anyone’s attention. Ok fine. She never liked me in that way in the end. I know that. I accept that. What I didn’t accept was her befriending me under false pretenses.