Had quite a shitty day yesterday between my teeth bothering me, the stress I’ve been under, and the nightmares I had almost every single minute I slept, which wasn’t very well at all.

I crashed around 11am and the first nightmare was about Tom’s supposed new job. He had to call in someplace in the mornings to know where to pick up the key to a building he was supposed to clean. One morning the phone broke and I was worried he might be fired.

Oh, it gets better. In the next dream, I woke up in what I thought was a jail cell. My ankles and wrists were bound. I sat up on the only bed in the cell and immediately thought I was there, thanks to guess who. A man sat at a table outside the cell staring at me.

“OMG!” I screamed. “I can’t believe I’m being victimized by my very own perp all over again! Had she just left me the hell alone like I asked her to months ago, none of this would’ve happened. But when you push, pick and provoke people long enough, sometimes they lash out at you. However, I did NOT threaten her with company!”

The guy asked me what I was talking about and I said, “Apparently someone threatened to send someone over to her house, probably anonymously, and she thinks it’s me. I promised myself 11 years ago that if anyone ever spited or harmed me or my family ever again, be it legally or not, I would make sure that whenever anyone asked them what their worst experience in life was, fucking with me would be the first thing to come to mind. And just as soon as I get outa here…”

Then the guy cuts me off with this hideously evil laughter and then it hit me that my being there had nothing at all to do with this person whatsoever. I also realized I wasn’t bound with handcuffs and shackles but with duct tape.

I studied the “lawyer” and noted how shabbily dressed he was.

The final realization was that I was in someone’s basement, not jail.

Then I’m in some building – a jail? A hospital? I’d guess a hospital of some kind by the looks of it. I realized I napped too long and it was just past dinnertime. I stepped out into the hall by what appeared to be a nurses’ station, a semi-large sitting room, and an elevator.

Voices in the distance suddenly grew louder and a woman spoke over a PA system saying something about being alerted to a public health threat. The voices grew louder and appeared to be either on another floor (I got the impression I was on an upper floor) or another part of the same floor. The voices, mostly male, weren’t excited or cheerful, but angry and fearful.

I looked at the elevator doors, realizing that if these people ever made it to where I was I might very well be killed. A part of me was curious to go down to the cafeteria where my dream self thought they might be and see what was going on, or to try to get out of the building but knew that might be too risky. Especially if the elevator stopped where all the screaming and shouting was taking place.

So I decided to stay put and try to hide somewhere, but there was nowhere to hide. The hospital-like bed couldn’t conceal me, and the closet was just a sunken part of the wall with very few things hanging from its rod.

I woke up in a sweat even though it was 65º in the bedroom and ran out to the living room. Tom had just gotten in. “I’m afraid something bad’s gonna happen!” I told him, and told him about the dreams.

“We have lots of phones, and we’re never going to live where there could be riots like that, so you’re just being paranoid. Everything is fine,” he told me.

So I went back to bed, unable to fall back asleep as tired as I was. Then finally, at around 5pm I started drifting off when this fierce pounding woke me right up. As in pig pounding. Pigs don’t “knock” when they go to people’s houses, they pound. And so even though it seemed a little late in the day since most pigs prefer to do the bulk of their dirty business early in the morning, that was my first thought; that it was the pigs come to punish me for what my own perp started and instigated all on her own.

I bolted out into the living room to keep Tom from opening the door when he told me it was thunder. If something wasn’t trying to taunt me, then I’m not short! It had been quick and repetitious just as if someone were actually pounding on the door!

Finally, I fell back into a wonderfully dreamless sleep till around 9:00. And still I wonder if these dreams are a sign of trouble to come. Even Alison said she had a feeling something bad was going to happen this week, though she doesn’t have a strong feeling it’s got to do with me.

Christine sent a lovely message. She viewed me for the first time from home that I know of over the weekend. She took a day off from work yesterday. I decided I know and trusted her enough to send her a copy of their legal threats to get her opinion on them.

As for that “independent observer” they said would start monitoring my blog, the only two U.S. views I got today came from my friends Aly and Kim. Then there were two in Malaysia and one in Indonesia. The Indonesian viewer and one of the Malaysian viewers came in on search terms for “fuck off.”

Molly herself only made one view in the late morning. Because it was just one I’m wondering if it was her mother. Molly never does anything just once.

Got a flower smile from Nane on Facebook, sent flowers back along with an email message yesterday and a couple of wall notes today, but never heard back from her. That’s just Nane for me, though. It’s like she wants to be friends but she doesn’t.