Yesterday Tom got back from meeting with the food assistance people with a big smile on his face. I asked if everything was ok and he said everything was better than ok and to go ahead and make up a huge grocery list.

We got our food subsidy card with over $300 in credit for starters since they pay you from when you first filed! We’ll be getting $245 a month from here on out. This will be a tremendous help and really take a lot of pressure off us. Life may still have other worries and other things to deal with, but food will be one less thing to have to worry about for a while.

He said there were a lot of people there but he only had to wait about 5 minutes. He told the woman, “Hopefully I’ll get a job tomorrow and I’ll have wasted all your time.”

But the woman said that even if he did we were guaranteed the food subsidy for the next 3 months no matter what. We could become millionaires tomorrow and it’d still be a done deal. :)

I won the book Wicked Lies by Lisa Jackson. :) A few years ago I won her Almost Dead novel and loved it, so even though I’m not a regular reader anymore with all I have to do these days, I’m sure I’ll love this one, too.

My own book should be on Smashwords soon enough. I created an account there yesterday.

Eileen said she felt guilty for not being a good enough friend even though she thinks of me every day. But her husband needed surgery and I guess her grandkids are sucking the life right outa her too, and so she hasn’t had time to finish my book. She promises to finish it and leave a review soon, though, and as I told her, she’s a fine friend and I do understand.

The turquoise sold for $8 and we’ll just keep listing lots until the whole margarine container is gone. His parents gave it to us in the mid-90s. They had a neighbor from Mexico who was a jeweler. He asked that they hang onto it for him while he went home to visit but he never returned.

It’s hard to believe that person who was so excited about moving in here 3 years ago is the same person who now gets depressed when she thinks of how many more years she could be stuck here since I know that getting ahead doesn’t necessarily mean getting out. But it’s going to be ok because over the years I’ll personalize it, fix it up nice as money permits, and turn it from Jesse’s trailer to our home until I’ve made so many damn changes that I don’t want to leave it and let someone else enjoy all the benefits.

I don’t understand why I don’t want to stay here anyway. Ok, so there’s more barking than I’d like, but that’s everywhere. If we got rid of a lot of the junk we rarely use and don’t need and then redesigned this place it would be perfect for us. Totally ideal. Owning is too risky, so why wouldn’t I want to just stay put and make the best of this place? Hmm… I think I do, but was just having trouble, once again, accepting the fact that life isn’t what we plan it. The only problem is that we can’t redesign the place if we’re broke. And of course there’s only so much redesigning we can do when you only have 500 square feet to work with.