A friend asked me about crushes, how many I had, who they were, etc, so I thought I’d dedicate an entry to crushes, LOL. Well, like most people, they vary. Taken or not, we all have them. We all recognize a good-looking person when we see one and can’t help who we are or aren’t attracted to no matter how devoted and in love we may or may not be to a particular person.

Sometimes I may see someone in a store, in a movie, online or wherever, and find myself attracted to them. They’re almost always women and rarely ever men. Even a couple of the Italian guards who once escorted Amanda Knox to and from court were kinda hot in my book. Right now I’m “crushing” on a woman in Germany and also have what I’d describe as a partial crush on another woman in Germany. I saw a semi-attractive Serbian woman in a foreign film the other night. Chris Noth from the original Law & Order series has always been nice-looking. But it’s kind of hard to put a number on how many people I’m attracted to since they vary in degrees as well as in numbers. A friend of mine in the southeast is quite a hottie but not in the same way this German college professor I briefly knew online is (until I saw a close-up of her face and realized she wasn’t quite as pretty as I thought she was despite having a great body).

I’m a face person. In other words no matter how perfect your body may be, if your face doesn’t attract me, then I won’t be attracted to you in that way. I could like you as a person, but I’ve never had a crush on anyone whose face was either just there or ugly IMO. I can be attracted to someone who’s overweight, but there are limits of course, as there usually are with most of us. I may be no skinny mini myself, but we can’t help what turns us on/off, and extreme obesity just doesn’t cut it for me.

Regardless of body weight/shape, I usually go for tall women with dark eyes and hair, though there have been some exceptions. I prefer straight hair to curls since I’ve got enough damn curls of my own to make up for both of us. I’m short and this is something women don’t usually go for. I’m muscular from working out, though feminine. I don’t look butchy in any way and I’ve never cared for that look myself. I know we can’t help what we look like for the most part, but you don’t have to “be a man” to be attracted to or to love another woman, as far as I’m concerned. That’s the one thing I could never understand. What’s the point of looking like the men you’re supposedly not attracted to anyway? I just don’t see what hair length should have to do with who we’re attracted to. I’m not going to cut off my hair just because I find some women attractive. Nor am I going to stop wearing lipstick and heels for them, though I don’t do these things as much as I did years ago anyway. I don’t care to look like a sloppy frump, but I prefer the comfortable look these days to the flashy look.

I have imperfections that can be a turn-off such as a deformed left ear and overly large eyes and long eyelashes. My nose is fine but my lips are too thin.

I tend to be attracted to a certain type of personality that’s usually not attracted to mine in return so I had shitty luck with women before I met Tom. That’s because opposites don’t attract in the real world, but only in mine. Straight vs. gay couples are funny in a way cuz while straights are a little more open to those who are different from them personality-wise, they seem to want to look more alike. With gays, they tend to seek out similar personalities but opposite looks. In other words, I do a great job of attracting loony butches. I don’t mean to sound cold, rude or judgmental. I’m just being blunt is all. I’m a little “loony” myself, and as I just said, opposites don’t usually attract personality-wise in the gay world. The so-called “normal” types with good careers and a more “civilized” and quiet personality tend to steer clear of me.

No matter who you are or what you look like, I am a sarcastic bitch with an answer for everything. I’m weird and I do many things in a strange way. I understand things most people don’t and I don’t understand things most people do. I have a driving phobia and cannot keep a schedule, but I can teach myself languages and write stories. I have a silly and sometimes sick sense of humor. I’m loud, I’m fast, I’m obnoxious, I’m outspoken, but I’m me.

When I have a crush on someone I tend to do two things. One is that I want to know everything there is to know about them, big and small. This causes me to ask lots of questions which can sometimes give them the wrong idea and make them think that my curiosity is really nosiness or that I have ill intentions in mind.

The other thing I do is find any compliments they may give me a million times more flattering than if they came from someone I’m not crushing on.

Well, it’s been fun sharing with you what tends to make me go crushy-crushy, but I’ve got to get on with other things now.