Another cold, windy rainy day here. Loving the sounds of the wind chimes, though.

So much for trying to adapt to feeling anxious. Last night I broke down and took a lorazepam because the anxiety picked up and my heart got a little racy. I will be seeing Dr. A in mid-March, but again, I don’t see what she can do for me. No one’s managed to help me with this yet, so I’m pretty much on my own. Right now I feel fine, but who knows how I’ll feel later on.

When I was reading about perimenopause, the article said that doctors often fail to recognize what’s going on, and I do have to wonder… would anyone have yet to bring up this theory to me if I hadn’t figured it out myself?

I’d guess that more than likely I need some type of hormone therapy instead of anxiety medication, but I just don’t know which one or how I would avoid the side effects when I’m a magnet for them.

Anyway, the lorazepam calmed me down but it also knocked me out. I slept a long time, too.

Tom ordered his brain pills, as he calls them. It’s QPP, which helps him think better. Because he’s getting older his brain just doesn’t work like it used to and he’s had trouble with programming as well as with making the cuts for the floor edges.

My own memory, which was damn near eidetic, isn’t quite what it used to be. It was scary-bad before the Hashimoto’s diagnosis, and while that has improved since treatment, it’s not what it was years ago. I don’t think it’s just a matter of age; I think it’s also that the more we live, the more memories our brain has to try to keep track of.

My head and throat feel a little funny, almost in the way it would if you had a cold. Tom said people at work have been sick for up to three weeks. It’s that time of year, I guess.

For now, I’m going to go enjoy this calm because I know damn well it’s not going to last.