I skipped a day of posting because there truly isn’t much going on. My life is that adventureless, LOL.

Besides wondering if I should cut my hair off since it’s such a pain in the ass and I’m just never going to have the thin straight hair I wish I had, I’ve been wondering when this sexist country is going to have a holiday on account of a woman other than Mother’s Day. How about Amelia Earhart Day? It seems a lot more impressive to fly around the world than it does to “have a dream.”

Everybody has a dream.

For now, the almighty male will rule despite the fact that your average woman is much smarter (and better looking), and I’ll just deal with these thick, waist-length curls.

Oh, wait. There are two more things I’m wondering, actually. How many more months, or even years, will Molly stalk me? And how did I come to be the stalking victim of a complete stranger? Aren’t we usually supposed to know our stalkers unless we’re celebrities? Well, I’m no celebrity. The Arizona Republic sure tried to make one out of me for a while, but their success was incredibly short-lived.

Jesse was amazingly quiet yesterday and so far today, too. His dogs drove me crazy Friday and Saturday nights, but there hasn’t been nearly as much in the way of engine gunning. I only heard him once or twice yesterday, then I heard the truck come in shortly after I got up at 10:00 this morning. I’ve got the sound machine going now since I’m sure he’ll come and go a few more times between now and 6pm.

Later…

For the millionth time, why does God let good things happen to bad people??? I’m talking about Barbara I., the bitch that lived next to me in the projects in Norwich, CT when I was 26 in 1992. The mean bully who took advantage of how sick and weak I was (with severe asthma) and threatened me for trying to get her to control her fucking kids that were like two-legged animals. Their 9-year-old daughter wasn’t so bad, but their 3 older sons were a nightmare. Barbara took pride in flaunting her so-called toughness, and I honestly don’t know which of us was luckier that I was as defenseless as I was at the time since she would’ve spent time in the hospital and I would’ve spent time in jail.

She popped into mind earlier and I thought how I would just love to be threatened by her right now as a non-smoking, fit and healthy individual. Immature or not, I would love to see the look of embarrassment on her face after I picked her apart limb by limb.

I always said that I truly believe God protects my perps. No matter how bad they may burn me, I know they have His full protection. This really bothers me, too. Someone could kill me right now and I know God would see to it that they were never caught or punished in any way shape or form. Andy tried to assure me by saying that we’ll never know when those who wrong us get theirs and that karma really does exist. Oh, I know it does. It just doesn’t seem to exist for anyone who’s ever wronged me. And I doubt it will for anyone who ever may screw me over in the future as well. The only one that’s paid for certain assholes (I won’t bother naming all the names) is me. Just me. If any payback’s coming to them, it ain’t coming in this life. That much I do know.

“God doesn’t just protect them,” I complained to Tom one day years ago, “He rewards them. I wouldn’t be surprised if some of my perps have won the lottery.”

So I looked for her on Facebook and was surprised to be unable to find her, her husband or their 4 animals. Instead, I found an article saying that she was awarded 8 million bucks in court!

Thanks, God, I thought to myself and started seething with rage. But then when I saw what she went through and is still going through I felt a little better, but only a little. The bitch smoked for 25 years, and 5 years after I last saw her, she had her larynx removed at age 36. She now breathes through a tube in her throat, has no sense of smell, and can only eat soft foods.

Hmm… guess she won’t be threatening anyone anymore. Especially those she knows are too damn sick to defend themselves. I used to smoke too, and between that, bad asthma and allergies, and the stress they put on me and the sleep the fucking animals stole from me, I was sicker than a dog while I lived with her and her brood. She and her family made my life a living hell for 4 months, ultimately causing me to have a breakdown and end up hospitalized for a couple of weeks before my folks sent me to Arizona.

While it’s gotta be a real bitch walking around with a tube stuck in your throat, wouldn’t all that money more than make up for it? I would think that with all the comfort and security she can now afford, even though she didn’t win the money till last year, all the things she could do with the money would take her mind off of any tubes.

“Now I can go to any doctor I wish,” she was quoted as saying.

And I’m still sitting here wondering where I can go to get my teeth taken care of. I also wonder if we’re really going to be able to come up with the grand or so we’ll need in a few months like Tom says we will. That’s about the cheapest we can find that’s not a million miles away, but we’re still researching our options. Unlike her, I certainly can’t go to any doctor or dentist I wish. We wanted a place that makes dentures, figuring it’d be cheaper that way, but we just can’t find anything around us. A grand for the plan we found is better than 2 grand without it, but it still sucks to have to spend so much money because no one will hire him on or pay us for our own hardships in life.

Really, I have no sympathy for Barbara. She could have quit just like I did. Instead, she chose to go out and keep buying cigarettes. Quitting isn’t easy, but if I can do it so can others. It was her choice to smoke until she got cancer. The cigarette company didn’t force her to go out and buy their cigarettes, and it clearly says right there on their products that cigarettes are harmful to your health. Wish I could get paid for some of the stupid choices I’ve made in life! Too bad I’m not the type to go out and pick on those who are ill and defenseless. That may up my chances of that happening.