When I look back on some of my old journal entries from 15-20 years ago I gotta wonder how I had so much to write about back in those days. These days I may not see as many people in person as I did back then, but I have way more of a life than I ever did in the past and I do way more now than I used to.

Lately, however, I’m anything but motivated when it comes to story writing and will probably add Bunny Nose to my file of unfinished stories. I’ve got about 4 or 5 of them. My heart just isn’t in it right now, I guess, but maybe someday I’ll get fresh ideas to rekindle my enthusiasm.

The Internet is back to cutting in and out on us like crazy. It started this evening. I really hope to hell it doesn’t become an everyday thing again! We’ve still got a few months here. At least. Yeah, I’m still leaning towards renting instead of owning, and just hurrying up and getting out of here so we can have cable again and ditch this DSL shit is a great reason on its own to want to get the hell out. It’s so unreliable and the speed sucks.

MyOpera’s internal hit counter shows nearly 40 blog views in less than 24 hours. But is that 40 members or 40 page views? I would guess page views on a site as dead as MO.

Why does a 60-calorie beverage put half a pound on me and why is my right arm slightly longer than the left? I never noticed this before until I clasped my hands together earlier today and stretched my arms upward. That was when I noticed I couldn’t completely straighten the right arm. I placed my palms together and it’s definitely the arm that’s longer and not the fingers. It’s only a half-inch, though.

Since I can’t have the blessing of speaking my mind directly to the source, a pretend kind of therapeutic heart-to-heart is in order. It goes something like this:

I have done NOTHING to you in my entire life but try to get you to keep your noise out of our home decades ago and use a poor choice of words. You need to get over the past, let me go, and move on. All of you.

Nice try all those years ago, Joely. That makes 3 times you’ve tried to seek legal vengeance upon me, and twice you have failed. That “letter” from the “detective” screamed amateur and scam rather quickly, BTW. I don’t know if it was you who wrote it or someone you put up to it, but if I had fallen for it, what would have come next, extortion? Something worse? Was part of it Jerry’s “payback” for the rating I gave him on the cop rating site? There’s a reason corrupt officials like that lose their jobs like he did in 2005 on account of me and a few others he wronged. Why do you think he joined the family real estate business? Because he got sick of playing Cops and Robbers? Either way, you trolls made several mistakes. Here, let me show you.

1. The “letter” had some spelling and grammatical errors, something a professional writer doesn’t miss so easily.

2. And why Juan D? Isn’t that too John Smith-ish?

3. The letter fails to disclose what “case” was supposedly made against me.

4. There is some business you simply don’t conduct via email, particularly when you are first trying to establish contact. Any legit cop would have come to my door because they could have traced my IP# to my physical address at the time via my service provider. They probably could’ve gotten ahold of our phone numbers as well. Ok, so I was technically out of jurisdiction living in the state I was living in at the time, but your state could’ve sent a local official out to see me which it did not do.

5. You could have blocked me on Facebook or marked anything sent to your email address as spam and unsubscribed from my blog but you didn’t. This indicates how vengeful and vindictive you still were and no doubt are today. From what I’ve been told, this is what law enforcement would have advised you to do unless the messages were of a threatening nature or arriving in bulk quantity.

6. I did absolutely nothing wrong to you but exercised my right to free speech that was without threats, and therefore there could be no “case.”

7. Anyone can be behind a computer and no positive identity can be established and confirmed without face-to-face contact.

8. One of your biggest errors was the phone numbers. There really is a PD in the town you listed, but none of the phone numbers you gave matched it when I tried to verify a match. Shame on you for not thinking of that one, though the email address you left was live.

9. Another blunder was that the “message” was sent to several email addresses, some of which I didn’t recognize, and one that appeared to belong to Jerry, based on the name embedded in it. Oops. You obviously created at least some of the email addresses and definitely the phone numbers in hopes that I would call. But for what? So you could try to get me down there for no reason? To phish for info that you could use to scam me with? To harm me? I guess only you and your buddies know the answer to that one, huh? But no “cop” is going to send an email to someone claiming to have a case and also send it to half a dozen others.

10. Next boo-boo… Had there really been a “case” made against me, it would’ve automatically gone through the courts even if I was not servable and not present, thus resulting in an eventual default warrant for my failure to appear. There never was a warrant. I checked.

11. The world may be way too full of corrupt law enforcement officials with warped senses of priorities, but even so, why me? Why would honest, decent cops spend the time, money and resources on me when there are so many violent criminals running loose out there that are a serious danger to society?

12. I was a little alarmed at first when I saw several email addresses that I either currently had or had in the past, including one I managed for a friend with Asperger’s who can’t do these things on her own, but anyone can get that info for a small fee. So yeah, you became more and more obvious as I read the email.

13. The Internet was not in our name in 2010. It was in our landlord’s name. You can’t make a “case” in that case. It’d be like you making prank calls from my phone. Well, even though you’d be the one who did it, I’d still be the one legally responsible for it.

14. I was also a bit alarmed when Google supposedly informed me that your buds were snooping into my business, but again I realize that anyone can make an email appear to be rather legit. Phishers have created emails claiming to be from many well-known sites. Nothing new there.

You know, I’ll tell you something, and that’s that I don’t know what you are more of – scary or sad. Yeah, it’s sad that your life is obviously so damn dull and you feel you have nothing else better to do than to try to harm or scam me like that. But the scary part is the deep-seated hatred that you have always harbored, nurtured, and tried so hard to rekindle at my expense. I have never known anyone so spiteful and you’re probably only one of 2 or 3 people I could never forgive even with an apology, not that you’d ever be capable of one. If you and Jerry show up here, as you’ve threatened (or as whoever you put up to it has), I will have you both arrested immediately. I really, REALLY feel sorry for your kids, Joely. The example you have set for them is utterly appalling!

Now, if you and or your friends can FINALLY stop harassing me on various sites, I will refrain from contacting your local authorities. If you guys can do that, you will never hear from me again. Ever. Your choice.

Later…

LOL, Andy wants to hear me speak German, even though he knows I’m “allergic” to phones, he says. He’ll get a good laugh at that one. Not only cuz I’m not yet fluent, but it’s not exactly a very pretty language either. But it has been a while since we chatted by phone so we probably will one of these days soon enough.

I chatted in German with a girl in Germany on Ask yesterday and was a bit dismayed to learn she was only 15. Oh, she was very nice, don’t get me wrong. It’s just that most people my age would rather not chat with those in their teens and 20s. I really wish there were more people on Ask around my age! Not always, but usually you get a bit more maturity that way.

No “pretty lady” comments today. Just someone asking if I want to have crazy sex. rolls eyes Like I said, the site is fun, but choc-full of kids.

Jesse was actually kind and considerate today. Not the part where he drove down without calling first, but the part where he was kind enough to not only be driving something quiet enough to not wake me up but to give Tom 5 bucks for replacing the cooler’s float so he doesn’t have to. He came down about an hour before I got up, so only Tom talked to him. Tom let him know he replaced the valve in back as well. Jesse’s main purpose in coming down was to let us know his nephew would be down to weed tomorrow. He’s coming down early, so I should still be up. If not, it’s easier to go to sleep to noise than to fall asleep just to be woken up by it, especially if you’re not expecting it. Even though I had planned to eat as little as I could stand to today, I might eat a little more to keep my energy up. I don’t want to fall asleep too early all fatigued out from hunger and PMS both. Nonetheless, I’ve lost 4 pounds in the last couple of days.

Anyway, the quieter truck is something he actually built for his son for when he gets his permit next year. I guess he’ll be driving it for now. Well, I hope he will till we get out of here! That other thing was ferociously loud that the whole place rumbled like it would if it was thundering out or a loud car stereo was close by.

California seems to have fewer car stereos unlike down in Arizona and Oregon where it seemed like every few cars had them which makes me think they may fine those with them here. But all it takes is one to really drive you insane and make your life hell and I just hope to hell we don’t end up with one that either lives next to us or that visits regularly, wherever we may end up. Those things are the equivalent of someone hammering on all 4 exterior walls of your house during a thunderstorm and were the #1 reason we escaped to the country. :(

I giggle to myself when I think of how bummed out Jesse’s going to be when it comes time to give notice. How many tenants would care enough or even be smart enough to replace that valve and the float, and weed around the car and trailer like he did after he was told he didn’t need to? Then again, maybe he’s that optimistic that in his mind he thinks we’ll be easy enough to replace. Oh, we’ll probably be easy enough to replace, all right. That’s not the issue. But what kind of renters will he be able to replace us with? Let’s just say that if he ends up with tenants who are like most people he’s gonna wish we would call wanting to come back! LOL

I still have some soreness between my cheek and gum in the area where my tooth was pulled, so I peroxided it and took an Advil. They have what’s called a cafeteria plan at work, so Tom will get to pick and choose what we have for insurance. I guess they’ll have things like medical, dental, vision, long-term disability, etc. What sucks is that it all costs money either way, so hopefully they’ll give him the 13% raise his supervisor said he recommended so it won’t impact what he takes home as much. Tom doesn’t know what to expect there because based on what the people there talk about owning and renting and stuff like that, it doesn’t seem like the company can afford to pay all that much more than what they’re paying him now. But then someone else said something about him getting his last dollar or two or three. They probably have a limit as to how much they’re willing to pay their employees until the cost of living arises along with the employee’s seniority.

He also learned that all temps eventually become permanent unless they’re laid off right away. Now they tell him! It would’ve really eased our worries had we known this all along. But they hire them on twice a year. It wasn’t quite his turn yet but they bumped him up because they wanted him for the job he’s doing now.

Whatever insurance he chooses will kick in in 30 days. Damn! We’ll be insured for the first time in 9 years! :) The retirement thing won’t kick in for a few months, though. It’s kind of sad my dad isn’t alive to be told this great news. :( He’d be so happy for us. But if those who believe our loved ones can look in on us are right, then he knows. Somehow he knows. feels tears sting her eyes

I wish I knew what we can’t possibly know - how long will Tom work where he works? Will I ever win big again? I don’t think I’ll be “allowed” to ever win more than 10K cuz 20K and up would go against the “plan.” I sure would settle for a few grand after the move, though! A couple to replace the savings and one to get things for the place. A full-size washer/dryer is at the top of the list.

Anyway, Tom can find out about the cafeteria plan and other things, but it’s too bad we can’t find out just a few more things cuz that might impact the rent/own decision and how much money we should invest in things here. Not that I can ever see it happening, but if I knew I was gonna win 50K next year, for example, I wouldn’t want to be getting no washer/dryer. If I won 10K when he turned 60, it would be enough to move us long distance but even harder for him to find a job than when the economy was at its worst. Who wants to hire someone that’s just gonna retire in a few years?

I still think our best bet is probably gonna be renting in an adult community if we can get in, and hoping this job works out till he retires. That way nothing will upset the 401K. But even when he does retire we still may not be able to move. They don’t pay it out all at once, so while we may be able to save 5K to get across, we wouldn’t have the money to get into a rental much less to buy a place.