The internal and external sleep disturbances are bringing me right back to Citrus Heights. ☹ In less than a week I was woken up by outside sources three times. The garbage truck on Thursday, banging the next day, and yesterday it was the mower. Who will take the honors next time around? Really, this is getting ridiculous, and everything I did NOT come here for.

Sometimes it’s my own damn body waking me up. I either have to pee or I’m snoring too loud or having weird dreams. Yesterday I was horribly exhausted and I couldn’t do much of anything. Today I was able to do some cooking and cleaning and we’ll go to the store later to pick up a few things. I hope to exercise a bit too.

First day in 3 days that I’m feeling a little anxious. I’m wondering if that could be connected to the drop in dose yesterday. I even cut my waiting time just a little bit today and yesterday. I’m not feeling as warm anymore. I still think feeling really warm and the runs were connected to my TSH getting too low for me but I’m not 100% sure about that because I didn’t have other symptoms that usually go with it. We’ll see how I do with throwing in one 75 a week.

Tom thinks some of the banging I heard might have come from the lot in back. He saw new piles of dirt being stored there. It’s by the road but it’s not overly far from the house and it’s a straight shot so dump trucks could be heard back here if they bang loud enough. This goes to show what a nightmare it’s going to be when they eventually build something directly behind us. God help me if I end up with a parking lot just behind the wall. The vehicles coming and going will be my Hetlioz because I won’t be sleeping in the daytime at all. It could be worse than the old place!

So like I said, the mower woke me up just 3 hours into my sleep and it took me over an hour to fall back asleep. Termite Tammy was in one of the dreams I had. Tom was there as well and I said to him, “Guess who just died?”

“Bill?” he asked, referring to Tammy’s ex.

I nodded and tried not to laugh. 

I heard from Kim who is being typical Kim. The oh-so-perfect Kim forever in a state of denial. I asked her why she’s not allowed to volunteer full-time since she swears she doesn’t like being home too much and spending so much time reading and writing even though she almost always has no problem tapping me out a long rambling repetitious reply within a few hours of hearing from me. She said it was because her sister thinks she’s obsessed with being there even though she swears she’s not.

I could tell this dozens of messages ago. Even if she’s not necessarily obsessed with being there at the senior center, she’s definitely obsessed with Bob. That’s just autistics for you. Intense interests and obsessions. This isn’t just what I’ve observed within the ones I’ve known but have also read when I went to study to learn more about them. They can get very fixated on subjects and people and have sudden and irrational mood swings which is part of why I try to avoid them. They also seem to be notorious liars whether they can help being the way they are or not.

Kim has never taken an ounce of culpability for anything she’s ever done wrong. She’s never apologized for anything or accepted blame or admitted on her own that she made a mistake of any kind. She denies her past obsession with June, her current one with Bob, and I’m sure whoever she gets hooked on next, she’ll deny that too.

She tried to convince me the other day that she never did anything wrong online and never impersonated anyone. I always did say she was one of the worst liars I ever knew. She did things that were blatantly obvious even to an idiot yet she still couldn’t own up to things. Even Aly noticed this.

I did agree to call out Bob on his anti-gay comments and his piss poor attitude anonymously using the email addy she gave me. The attitude thing is one thing. It’s the anti-gay stuff that gets to me. Using an email account under a bogus name, I asked him to think about the people he offends when he casually spews his hate. The people who may be gay or have loved ones that are gay.

I also told Kim I’m only doing it once, and there are no guarantees he’ll see the message, or that she’ll hear about it if he does.

Incredibly it’s supposed to be hazy out there because the smoke from the Canadian wildfires has drifted all the way down to Florida. Thank God I’m not up north. I swear the other day I was in the bathroom and caught a faint whiff of smoke and thought I was going out of my mind.