So sick of waking up with these lower backaches! Can’t wait for my new mattress, though it may be a few months.

Really worried that cock’s given up on disability and gone back to work even if it’s just under-the-table odd jobs. This is the second morning in a row he hasn’t been around. I yell at the fucking dogs, they shut up, but then 10 minutes later they’re at it again. In the past, they were always at their worst from November 1st to mid-April where they barked steadily from 5am - 9am, then on and off for the rest of the day, and Nov. is right around the corner. :( Well, I don’t see how anyone can consider that “not that bad” no matter where/how they grew up. That is just way too much to even attempt to get used to. Yesterday was one thing. After an early morning fit, all was quiet for 5-6 hours, then there was another shorter fit. That’s tolerable and livable, but consistency is not and I would think most people would agree and that the responsibility shouldn’t have to fall on me to keep someone else’s dogs in line. Where I’m from people kept their dogs/music to themselves.

I do whatever homework I can whenever I can, even though the choice may never be ours. Everything I’ve read so far supports what my dad said about adult communities; you can’t leave a dog in your yard 24/7 unattended to bark all it wants. Some places put a 15-20 pound limit on the dogs which must be household pets and not backyard buddies.

Tom mentioned people mowing and trimming trees – first of all, mowing doesn’t bother me unless it was for hours every day and most people don’t do that. Secondly, if the lots were about the size of Phoenix, how many trees could they possibly have to trim? So unless Tom’s against it for some reason I still think it may be better than rural, cuz he said it himself – who’s gonna have a decent rental all by itself in the middle of 10 acres or anything else big enough to keep the nearest dog at a far enough distance so it’s not as loud as these two? And the further off the grid we go, the more we gotta worry about sonic booms and hunters. I think the only problem that could arise in an adult community would be car stereos, car door slamming and me having to be careful not to blast my own music, though we wouldn’t get a place where their driveway ran alongside our place, I could use headphones and car stereos make no sense. If they don’t allow kids or incessant barking, why loud car stereos? As he also said, each community may be different. But I still think the basic rules are the same everywhere. Either way, $1400 a month for just a 2-bedroom PLUS utilities doesn’t sit well with me and I would guess that’s about what it would cost. Especially in this state.

I just know that my parents would never find barking even for just an hour a day “ok” or “acceptable” or “reasonable” in any way, nor would they ever live in a place where that was an issue. I know that’s just one retirement community, but again, can they really vary that drastically? Not from what I’ve read, they don’t.

As for losing weight at this age – it seems hopeless whether you starve or diet because all you can do is delay the inevitable and not stop it altogether. Sure you’ll lose weight if you starve, but unless you’re prepared to starve forever, something no human being can do, post-menopausal weight gain is NOTHING compared to the struggles we go through once we’re pushing 40. So there’s nothing I can really do about it other than just keep fit till I get slammed with a ton more weight and can’t get around as easily. I just dread having to have Tom trim my toenails. :( It’s not as easy for someone this short to carry a lot of extra weight as it is for someone his height. And think of the money it’d cost to keep upgrading to bigger clothes sizes. But like it or not, it’s going to happen someday. I’m really going to be 200 or more pounds. I can only choose to let it happen sooner than later, but it’s menopause that’s gonna get the final say. Young people, on the other hand, have a choice. They’re young enough for their metabolisms to work hard and fast enough to burn more than they take in even if that amount is “reasonable.” Whereas at this age all I have to do is eat “normally” and I’ll gain about 20 pounds a year for life. That puts me going belly-up at about 800 if I lived another 40 years. I think I’d gain closer to 40-50 pounds a year, though, for that “normal” eating.

Humans just weren’t meant to live past 30, and we gotta pay for what we were smart enough to beat.

Becky sent me this recent pic of the evil witch A. She’s sitting with a collie and 9 other people, 4 being older, 5 being women in their 20s or so. I’m guessing the young ladies are nieces since she’s gay. When I saw the dog it reminded me of the one she had nearly 30 years ago. She took me to her house one time with a few other girls. It was a tiny old dark dumpy cottage in the woods and she had a collie then, too. All I really remember about it was all the books. Just hundreds and hundreds of them on wall shelves.

She managed to find Linda, another one who attended VH, and I found Michelle for her. We sent her friend invites but haven’t heard from her yet. Linda’s friends with Maryellen who I’ve been told is the youngest A sister but I don’t remember her at all. All I remember is Margaret and I couldn’t stand her much more than I could stand Donna and Barb. Speaking of Barb, I sent another message saying: What, no apology yet? Go on and give it a try, you just might find I’m a rather forgiving person. :)

But the fact that I haven’t heard anything from her makes me think she’s either ignoring me or hasn’t checked her messages. Usually, if you’ve got the wrong person they tell you so. I just asked a Denise M with no identifiable profile pic if she attended VH and she replied back saying she hadn’t.

We’re going to upgrade me from my 9-year-old Windows XP operating system which is becoming obsolete and switch me to Windows 7 at some point. I just hope it helps solve all my incompatibility issues! I’m so sick of having to pick and choose what’s most important to me and having to do without some things. Why can’t all browsers and programs just get along?! But the day there’s such a thing as “computer peace” will be the day there’s world peace. In other words, it ain’t gonna happen. :(

Yesterday I unblocked the troll just to see if she was still as persistent as she usually is. There was nothing all day, but then shortly after 4pm, in it came from Formspring. I caught her at 12 seconds and blocked her by 33 seconds. It wasn’t fast enough to stop her from accessing my post titled Trolls & BFF, though. Gee, I wonder why she’d go for that one first? said with sarcasm So now she’ll be sent to the funny farm until I decide to send her to an adult toy store or something like that. :)

I dreamt Tom and I were flying somewhere and our round-trip tickets cost $1500. LOL, isn’t that a bit much? Only we were going to meet Nane where she worked which had to do with the airline and not a bank like in real life.