Sarah posted a poorly written client rant, saying she was their hairstylist and not there to listen to anyone’s sex life. It’s almost scary how much she writes and sounds like her mother. Fortunately, though, neither niece seems to be interested in gabbing with me, so I don’t think either of them will become pests or anything like that, which is good since I still want to be friendly without being friends, so to speak. I don’t know about Becky, but I’m sure Sarah would join her mom in becoming a real online nightmare for me if the DQ and I ever became enemies again. I can totally picture her calling and letting Larry have it just like Tammy said she did, whether he deserved it or not.

Ask is having another wave of tech issues, but as frustrated as Andy and I are over it, we’re reluctant to move to Formspring. It’d be nice to throw some unwanted company off my scent, but Formspring really sucks shit. It’s totally NOT what it used to be.

Tammy said that dealing with our parents dying and having to run back and forth between Florida and Connecticut was the worst 10 months of her life. This inspired me to share my 3 worst experiences in life, though those of you who know me well should know what they are and what order they come in.

If you don’t know me well, you probably think jail ranks #1. Wrong. That’s actually the third-worst time of my life.

Well, then Valleyhead was the worst moment, right? Wrong again. VH is runner-up. It was even worse than jail because it was so damn structured. So as funny as I know it may sound, I had more freedom in jail than in that damn so-called private school, which the FBI FINALLY shut down.

The worst time of my life was when my husband and I were so sure that life would kill us if we didn’t take our lives first. In jail and VH, my sanity may’ve been on the line, but my survival wasn’t.

I still have a lot of anger – a LOT of anger – toward my own country/government for more than that huge scare and for stopping our benefits BEFORE Tom could find a job. To think that my own people could take care of others before taking care of their own makes me absolutely sick to my stomach. I tremble with rage at just how twisted and unfair life can be.

Jesus, just minutes after allowing for anonymous questions (I knew it was too early to do so), I get: What do you do if you want to talk to someone who doesn’t want to talk to you?

Kim obviously wants me to know it’s her, just not from an account I can block. Could’ve been Molly, though it’s obviously one or the other. I answered: I talk to someone who does.

Does it really take a genius to figure out that this would be the solution and the best way to handle that?

Absolutely NO more journal entries for Maliheh unless she asks for them. She obviously doesn’t want to keep in touch just like I’ve been suspecting and I don’t think she’s even reading them anymore. I don’t know if something else is going on in her life that’s caused her to crawl into such a shell or if it’s got to do with me, but unlike Kim and Molly, I’m smart enough to know that I can’t make people want to be more sociable.

Later…

I would love to sprinkle my online blog with blatant lies about Kim just to piss her off and really give her something worth reading, but since Aly reads it too, I won’t waste my time.

Forgot to mention the dreams I had last night. The “dream people” told me where we’re going. Well, they might have anyway. In the dream I asked Tom if we could “turn something into balloons” and he said, “Nah, cuz before you know it we’ll be out of here and over in Lincoln.”

Lincoln is close to where he works, and some guy at work suggested he look there, but locations don’t usually mean anything in the way of a possible dream premonition to be. I need to “see” things. Reasonable things like what I saw before our last two moves – chain-link fences, white picket fences, woods, etc. Not 4000-square-foot barns or 8-story houses.

The second dream was Nane telling me she was going to come visit me in a year and me starting a countdown in my blog. Now that will never happen, LOL.

Received some very flattering and encouraging feedback from my Pakistani friend, so maybe I will resume the story I was working on. I’ll wait till I’m home alone or Tom’s asleep. I work better that way. She has been kind enough to act as a consultant to the book since there’s only so much research one can do on a place they’ve never been to. Research can’t always replace having firsthand experience or consulting with someone who has.

Just when we were delighted not to be disconnected for an hour or two each morning and evening, they go and shut us down. So we switched over to the hotspot, and while it’s wonderfully fast, it’s just not reliable out here. Speed and reliability simply won’t come while we’re still here. I’d like to think the dream was a sign that we’re going to find a great deal on what we want real soon, but I still think we’ll be here for years. Since deciding that we refuse to settle for anything less than what we want, we’re just going to have to wait till we can get it.

We’re now waiting on a second air cleaner or scanner, though. For $125, we ordered both. I’m sure this scanner will be a far cry nicer than the one in our shed that we got in the 90s.

I’m just about a week late for my period now. Sometimes I still feel like I’m going to get it. A part of me wishes I would just to flush all this water off me, but I’d rather never get the damn thing again.

Readplease no longer exists, last.fm no longer allows unlimited song skipping. Yup, all good things really do come to an end.