Wednesday, December 19, 2012

Sure enough, really early this morning, the troll looked in on me from Harlingen.

Oh my, do I have lots to update on! First, just to get the trivial things out of the way – this is day 4 of being late for my period. I’m beginning to break records! If I were just a little younger and had a husband who could perform normally in bed I’d be getting nervous. By the weekend I’d be shitting bricks. Then again, I wouldn’t be dumb enough not to use protection if I knew I didn’t want kids. I’d like to think menopause is setting in, but this young and this abruptly? I don’t think so.

Got a cold setting in instead. Yeah, the “influencer” can no longer stop her colds, but she can kill people. Not sure I’d exactly classify this one as “trivial,” though, and I don’t know the details or if what Tammy and Mark were told was bullshit or not, but Larry supposedly has liver cancer and looked and acted ill when they last saw each other down in Florida. As most of those that know me know, especially my husband who has witnessed it, bad things tend to befall those that really piss the shit out of me. I seem to be like Drew Barrymore, only I’m the fire starter without the fire. I have little control over it. I never cared for my brother other than his sense of humor, but if it’s true that he’s dying, then wow. Just wow. My dad died in February. Our beloved rat died in April. My mother died in September. My beloved foster mother died in October. My sister’s been sick as hell. Another rat of ours died last month and now my brother may be getting ready to check out of Hotel Earth. This is getting a bit scary.

So is the prospect of Larry’s spirit being a negative influence against me along with our mother’s. I hope my “heart” mom will protect me from them. Just like I figured that if God can bless, He can curse, well, if some spirits can influence us in positive ways (if we were close to them), why not bad ways, too (if they were assholes)?

I will get into Tammy’s package in the next post, but first, we exchanged messages this morning and FB is REALLY pissing the shit out of me. The people running it need to watch THEIR livers, LOL. I could message Becky, but not Sarah. She straightens her hair, which is something I’d like to do without using damaging things like straightening irons. Well, I’d like to know what she uses to do it with.

Had to explain to her yet AGAIN, thanks to some of my messages not going through, that I can’t just take an hour or two to call her every few days or so, and I wouldn’t even if I didn’t have such tech issues to deal with out here in the boonies. Too busy, and well, I’m just not a phone person, though I told her to feel free to leave me as many voice messages as she’d like since she isn’t big on typing. Retrieving messages isn’t the issue; it’s calling out that’s the problem.

The more we exchange messages, the more I see she really has changed a lot as well as hasn’t changed much. She still harbors a lot of hurt and anger and vengeful ways. But she has grown at the same time a lot of her old self shines through. As long as we’re never neighbors we should be ok. Also, even if she did get pissed at me and seek revenge by calling my local pigs with some tall tale on me, it won’t do her any good in the end when they run their routine checks just to discover there’s no warrant on me. The odds of that happening again would be next to none if I lived another 10,000 years. That was a fluky experience for damn sure. One that could only be set up and carried out by a vengeful God who used Tammy and Bill as an instrument to flush me out to the pigs and welfare bums, and again, If God can love, He can hate. He has hated me most of my life.

Tammy wanted to vent about the usual 3 people – Lisa, Larry and Mom. I guess they weren’t very nice to her when she was in Florida. Lisa spent most of the time at the beach while she paid for her food and cigarettes, mom acted like she was never there, and Larry said some mean, hurtful things to her that Sarah called and really laid into him for it. The poor girl’s taking something for the anxiety, something I warned her to be careful with, knowing firsthand how easy it can be to get hooked on the things.

I’ve seen hideous pics of her kids as well as decent ones, but I’m certainly not going to say that in public, LOL. She sent tons of pics, and a few were of her kids. I’ll cover that in the next entry.

Later…

Ok, now that I’m feeling a little better and think I just might’ve influenced the cold away, after all, I can finally cover the wonderful goodies my sister sent! Most of it, as promised, was some stuff she thought I might want to have from our parents’ condo after they died.

The package mostly contained old photos of my mom’s parents and some I had sent our parents over the years. It’s kind of nice to have them back. When I first refused to talk to my parents for the 10 years that I refused to talk to them, I dumped every single one of their pictures. Well, most of them I actually mailed to Tammy. So for many years, I had no pictures of them except for the few they sent me in their last few years of life. Despite how much I came to despise them for their abuse, it was really neat seeing old pictures, some of which I remembered actually seeing at one point or another in my life. There was even a news clipping I was in as a kid.

We are going to get a new scanner and eventually, I will scan the pics in and post them online. I want to ask my sister about some of them anyway because I know she’ll remember more about them since she’s older. This would be the easiest way to do that rather than trying to describe them by phone. I know who most of the people are in the pics, but some I don’t. Most of the pics are old and of bad quality, so I can’t see them very well with my shitty eyes. I will look at them again later with a magnifier. Andy’s going to get a kick out of one pic in particular, hahaha.

It’s also nice to have pics of Charlotte, even if they’re kind of old. I always loved Char. There were group pics of some of the old beach buddies. Leave it to Bea G to be giving the finger in one of them, LOL.

A couple of years ago I won a gift card to an online flower shop and sent my mom the Mother’s Day present she didn’t deserve – flowers in a gorgeous purplish-mirrored vase. Tammy was nice enough to send me the vase, along with a cute bamboo/panda vase. I love bamboo, so I’ll stick one of our smaller ones in it eventually.

She sent a couple of beautiful decorative large dishes with pink, purple and blue flowers and a decorative throw pillow cover.

There were some papers pertaining to Dad’s days as the president of the Mended Hearts organization, a group he founded for those who had open-heart surgery like he had.

Lastly, she enclosed a beautiful, glittery birthday card with cash and IHOP GCs.

I’m sure there’s more that I’m forgetting, but all of it was super appreciated. I never expected to get another package again in my life unless it was something we ordered, LOL.

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