Sure enough, I'm back to being tired. I was hoping for one more good sleep because I've gone as many as 4, but nope.

No more Azelastine, as I suspect it may be a problem with sleep. My sleep was very fraggy, and it even made my nose worse. I suspected it had before and had a feeling it might do it again, so I'm not gonna use that anymore. Had to elevate myself for a while, which isn't as comfortable.

I see a definite pattern here. A few good days followed by a few bad days, and back and forth and back and forth. It really is like something is putting limits on how many days I sleep well. So I know I'm not gonna be sleeping well next time around either, and I'm bound to sleep shitty if I can stand to use the new mask until I get used to it. So, not looking at energy again until the middle or late part of the week. :(

I'd love to see what my energy levels were like if I could stop having so many sleep disturbances so often. I swear, if it isn't one thing, it's another. Again... patterns. Patterns that are hard to believe could be a coincidence. Between congestion, snoring, and just because, I woke up a million times. I try to remind myself that this is me, the me I've come to know, and it's true. The longer I have fatigue, the harder it is to imagine myself any other way, just like I stopped being able to imagine myself thin again years ago. So I try to see the good in it and remind myself that if I had energy all the time, I would end up bored, restless, and wishing we had more money to do more things outside of home. If it really is a curse, then no mask, supplement, or location is going to change it. So might as well embrace it and accept it. I'll get my energy back for a few days in a few days. It rotates just like I rotate between days and nights.

At least I had a couple of funny/weird dreams instead of sad/scary ones.

I went to the grocery store with Stacey in Cali, but we didn't seem to buy anything.

Then I went to see my glaucoma doctor, and on the way there, I realized I had my robe on over my shirt and my slippers on instead of sandals or other shoes. I asked Tom if we had enough time to go back, but he said we didn't. So I took off my robe before going in, hoping they wouldn't notice my slippers. However, they were big, fluffy, and bright white, standing out like a neon sign.

Andy sent me a friend request again, but I didn't delete it. I'm not going to accept it either. It can just sit there. I feel bad, but set in my decision as well. Yes, I feel guilty for ignoring him and not accepting his bad traits, but we're not talking minor annoyances here. I think in this case it's better to be selfish and consider my own self and the way he'd often make me feel. Besides, when I accidentally stumbled upon that article that talks about what makes a friend toxic, he nailed nearly every single one of them. I get that he may mean well in his heart and not be aware of his faults, but his delusions and paranoia really get to me at times. All the false truths, the memory issues, etcetera.

I had just started accepting friend requests again too, in case Toni added me.