The IHOP turned out to be great. It was funny, though, cuz on the way there I commented to Tom that the bill would come close to the amount of the GC which was $25. He said, nah, it wouldn’t, there are a lot of places having specials these days, etc. But sure enough, it was $4 just for his soda and my coffee which was excellent since they’d just opened and brewed their first pot. It all came to $23.88. He got chocolate chip pancakes, and I got sirloin bits mixed with sautéed mushrooms and onions which included two eggs, hash browns and a couple of buttermilk pancakes which I soaked in butter pecan syrup. Man, was it good! I even ate most of the nearly 1200-calorie meal, too. Since Tom’s been dieting and isn’t used to eating so much at once, he couldn’t finish his. Not even I’m used to eating so much at once! I was full for hours.

I was told by Shanara that my journal was inspiring to her because I don’t try to sugarcoat my life. I had to laugh at this one because usually it’s the other way around and I tend to drive people away when I’m having my down times. Not intentionally, of course, but I do tell it like it is, and many people are simply put off by us when we’re in a foul mood of some kind. As I told her, though, I WISH I COULD sugarcoat my life. Believe me, I WANT to be able to fill this journal with all kinds of happy things. Yet I continue to sit here and watch people just go up and get what they want in life with little to no effort at all while I pray to God for just the damn basics just to be ignored. What’s the trick? Really, what am I doing wrong? Why is it that so many people can just up and take what they want from life as easily as one gets up in a restaurant, walks over to a buffet table, selects what they want and walks away with it?

So many people say they believe God loves everybody equally. Yet look at all the diversity in life. Does He really, really love us all equally? Or could it be that people choose to tell themselves this because it’s just too damn scary to think otherwise and to accept the possibility that He/It may actually have it in for some of us?

In other news, I began learning Esperanto which should be simple enough and take no time at all being yet another romance language. It’s one of those cases where I could understand the gist of what was being discussed if I looked at a webpage in Esperanto, but couldn’t pull whatever I wanted to say out of thin air on my own until I study it. I can’t decide if it’s more similar to Spanish or Italian. Some of the words are close to German, and of course I would not know that had I not started learning German. So it’s true that the more languages you learn, the more they help with others. So far I have begun learning just a few rules and basic words, but just as soon as the language learning site I normally use gets its act together I can begin learning it right. Those jerks always have tech issues, always.

Later…

LOL, no more friending Maliheh’s friends. She’s now not only got her friends invisible (except for the 3 that have accepted my friend requests), but now she’s hiding her likes/interests and she removed that face shot I mentioned in my last entry, too. I’m surprised she didn’t block me altogether, but like I said, she could be hoping I’ll harass her so she can then have grounds to get me. That’s ok. I’m smarter now than I was 19 years ago. I know how not to get carried away. She’ll never fuck with me again. She just doesn’t want me getting at her friends, obviously, and that’s ok, too.

Well, now there’s no doubt as to whether or not she knows what’s going on, LOL! I’ll back off now. Wouldn’t want to burn any of the few bridges that are left when it comes time to let her know her story is done – hahaha!!!! I mean, I still have her email addy, but she might’ve blocked me or marked me as spam. Maybe she’ll be curious enough to keep checking my journal every so often to see if it’s there, but I will email her and let the friends of hers I can get a hold of know about it when it’s done.

I forgot to mention that I asked one of her friends who went to initiate a live chat with me after “wowing” a couple of my photos how Maliheh’s doing these days and how they knew each other. He played drums for her for a few months, he said. What, was she a singer or something? I don’t remember her mentioning being into singing in the very brief time we knew each other, but she did mention playing the guitar. Anyway, this one unfriended me, obviously not wanting to get involved or go against Maliheh, but I still have the other two friends.

Jesse’s gunning engines now. I’m not surprised. He does love the cold and it seems the only time he can sit still is at night or when it’s hot. Well, when he’s even around in the first place. Like I said, as annoying as they both are, I’d rather the barking than the engine gunning because that’s easier to drown out. I wouldn’t mind if he’d finish the weeding down here, especially so I can have a clearer running track, but I also want to go to sleep soon, too.