Molly spent 41 minutes in my LJ blog from her relative’s place in Brownsville. So that pretty much tells me that she either was going to the MD one from home because she didn’t want to appear on my MO tracker, or she was disabling cookies at home. It could also be that her mother blocked MO on her computer, but this proves what I figured; that she’s been following me all along. If she could be interested in what I have to say on Ask, why not my blog, too? Now that she knows LJ is tracker-ready, it will be interesting to see if she continues to go there. Or at least in a way that appears on my tracker. After what I went through with Kim, she’s welcome to follow me all she wants. I totally prefer her to Kim any day and find her a welcoming refreshing breath of fresh air. Like I said, for someone who’s usually a good judge of character I had NO idea Kim was crazier than Molly on Molly’s craziest of days. Maybe not quite as mean as to wish someone’s cancer would kill them or to express what they’d like to do to their parents in their sleep, but definitely not quite as crazy or quite as shitty with lying.

Still recovering from my cold, and yes, it was definitely a cold given how long it lasted and the symptoms I had that I don’t usually get with just allergies. My nose and ears are still stuffy. Not sure the air cleaner’s helping much because I awoke several times on account of my nose being blocked. At least it quit having to potty. That was so damn annoying with the way it would run every so often. Oddly enough, my mouth was also dry even though I haven’t taken any cold or allergy pills since the day before yesterday.

Was finally able to get on the treadmill, but only for 10 minutes. My energy levels still aren’t very high. I’m relaxing for a while before tackling some cleaning.

Started the raspberry ketones, but only one pill instead of the two pills it recommends to see how my body takes to it. No nausea, but I might be just slightly jittery. I can’t really tell if it’s that or if it’s just because I’m still sick.

The email mystery has been solved. The one where Tom would receive things I’ve sent in the past with what I currently sent. Well, what the Mac’s email program apparently does is it groups emails together with the same subject title.

I forgot to mention that I befriended Wissal on Facebook the other day and told her “I know your secret” like she told me on MD, LOL. She was a little shocked at first, but I told her not to worry about it. I just thought it was funny if I surprised her and I guess I did!

Whether or not certain people are ugly or beautiful is a subjective matter, same as what foods are good and bad. So does it matter to me whether or not someone supports or understands how I feel on certain issues? Well, yes and no. Sure it’s nice to have those I’m close to get where I’m coming from. But it really doesn’t matter in the end who thinks what because nothing they could possibly think could change the facts or how I feel. So I guess what it all comes down to is how I feel and that I be honest with myself and do what’s best for me.

I don’t know what the hell’s going on with the move, but I do know I’m so fucking sick of all these goddamn plumbing problems! God am I ever sick of it and living like a fucking bum! The fucking pipe under the bathroom sink is leaking again but we are NOT going to deal with HIS problems anymore. I just threw a pan under the pipe, though we have to sop it up with an old towel before we empty it because it’s such a tight fit between the floor and pipe that it sloshes out when we try to pull the pan out. The wood is rotting in so much of the place, too.

As I’ve said before, it really pisses the shit out of me that we’ve had to live like this for so long. I have nothing against those who have it better in life, especially if they’ve worked hard and deserve what they’ve got. It’s those that work hard to be rewarded with this kind of bummery that pisses me off.

Whatever’s up there could allow us to get moved and let Tom have steady work until he retires while we do our best to be as smart as we can about our money in which case we’d never have to struggle again in our lives. But would it be that kind to us to let us have the security we deserve? I doubt it, but if all my inheritance will do is buy us the things on our list that we want for the new place, wherever it is and whenever we end up living in it, fine. That’ll be good enough for me since I know not to expect too much out of life anyway. I have been blessed for nearly two decades now with the most important part of life and that’s love. I am also healthy for the most part, too.

Trying to decide whether or not I want to make LJ my only public blog. It pretty much has all the features I like (I can insert pictures, trackers, and backdate old entries I’m posting from the 80s on up), so I might make my other two blogs friends only/private and just use those as a backup. Haven’t decided yet. It also appears that I can search the blog after all. There’s no “whisper” feature on LJ, but it’s cool how I can add moods, locations and what I’m currently listening to on my last.fm radio station. The only thing I can’t do on LJ is change backgrounds. Hmm… decisions, decisions. Should I keep all 3 public or go with just LJ?

I’m worried about my friend Eileen right now and her husband. They have plenty of friends and family around who would never let them be homeless, which is good to know, but I worry because not only did their business go under and cause them to be living off of savings for the last 6 months, but Eileen’s husband was hit by a car while riding his bike. He ended up with broken ribs, ringing in the ear, and a disc in his spine pushing on the sciatic nerve. For these things to happen to them definitely goes beyond just “bad luck.” I mean, that is a definite, definite curse. shakes head sadly Again I have to wonder why such bad things happen to such good people as Eileen and her husband. I told her to let me know if she needs help and she said it brought tears to her eyes that I would offer. Hey, she helped us and that’s what friends are for.

No news on Mom yet so I guess nothing’s changed with her and she hasn’t been moved to the hospice just yet. So I don’t know what’s going on at the moment, though I guess Tammy will call me from whatever state she’s in as soon as something changes. Like I said, despite the past problems we’ve had it’s hard not to think about her and hope she isn’t suffering. At least not too much anyway. I never wanted any pain or punishment to befall my mother, but if those who believe karma gets us in the afterlife for the things we didn’t pay for here are correct, then she’s got some hard times ahead of her once her earthly life is over, cuz she sure as hell never paid for the things she did to her kids here. Perhaps just with a touch of guilt or regret at times, though I don’t think she realizes all she’s done wrong. Some abusive mothers really don’t consider themselves abusive at all and instead, they believe they were good mothers. I think she’s aware of some of her mistakes, though, because my mother isn’t crazy or stupid.

The air cleaners they make these days are so quiet and lightweight compared to the one we got in Phoenix that we ditched not too long ago. This one has an ionizer but I only use that when I’m awake cuz it has a bright blue light that comes on when it’s active and I like sleeping in total darkness.

Still too soon to say how the raspberry ketones, if at all, are going to affect me. Since I didn’t puke or get too jittery, I’m going to take the second pill after I’ve been up for 10 hours cuz that’s when my hunger tends to be worse. I told Aira about it and she’s going to check it out on Amazon. It does seem to be curbing my hunger somewhat and filling me up faster when I do eat, but I need to give it more time to see how it really does.