If things happen for a reason, then the reason I’m still alive is because of Tom. It’s literally using him to keep me alive and my suffering going, since it knows I’m reluctant to end it because of him, if there really is anything up there actively planning our lives. I can guarantee he’ll live the long life he wants to live if this is the case!

I decided not to forgo my CPAP last night because it helps me breathe, even though my AHI score is sometimes slightly elevated and I'm short of breath. The shortness of breath has been subtle but obvious, and I'm not sure if it's coming from my lungs or my stomach/diaphragm, possibly due to my hiatal hernia.

Although I doubt it will do me any good, I ordered a pair of sleep headphones. I guess you insert a soft foam plug first and then blast a low-pitched sound, for example, that will match what you're trying to mask. When the thunder is ferociously loud, however, nothing can save me if I'm sleeping at the time. I'm just getting a little worried because, according to my research, this area goes into drought every 5 to 10 years and isn't likely to do it again for the rest of the decade. So 5 months of near-daily storms could really be a killer on me if I can't hold my schedule.

I would really love to know what my TSH and vitamin D levels are now. I've been unusually cold. Hopefully, adding more iron and vitamin D will help. My fatigue has been off the charts. I'm hoping that since I didn't get woken up by anything last night, even though my sleep was a bit fragmented, that I'll have a little more energy today. Like, maybe enough to actually get to the store. We've been wanting to go back to the new dollar store.